Kogao! Double Face Mask is Actually a Prison For Your Face

Yes! I can finally finish up that Flash Gordon costume I’ve been working on. Why couldn’t this have come out before Halloween, though, that would have made a little more – oh, it’s a beauty product.

Despite all appearances, the Kogao! Double Face Mask is indeed a beauty product. This one supposedly keeps your face small and tight, preventing wrinkles around the eyes while making you look like a totally rad crime fighter. In case you’re wondering, it’s called a double face mask because there are two sets of straps stretching and contorting your face at once. Fun! But don’t worry, the description reassures you that the mask is “really easy to fit over your face and won’t feel uncomfortable at all,” which is somehow less reassuring than it should be.

Or, you know, you can complete your superhero costume. Sounds like a better plan to me. That said, you might just want to head to Party City or something for that, because the Kogao! Double Face Mask will cost you all of $66 – $51 for the mask, plus $15 for shipping from the Land of the Rising Sun and Aggressive Beauty Products.

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