These Pokémon Valentine’s Day Cards are Totally Goofy and We Love Them

It’s February — a wild romantic holiday is about to appear! Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and if you, like many people of a certain age, met your significant other while playing Pokémon Go, you need a way to properly celebrate your love. Fortunately, the holiday has spawned a shadow greeting card industry boasting wordplay so corny, so goofy, and so good that Hallmark should honestly be sweating. You’ll see what we mean.

Starting off with a classic — you just can’t go wrong with the four starters that first captured our hearts!

JessicaScissorhands/Etsy

You don’t need to evolve for anyone!

playerNo2/Etsy

Implicit: never change.

playerNo2/Etsy

Reminder: we live in a time when not only do Pokémon pick-up lines exist, they actually have a good chance of working. What a time to be alive!

DontMoveStationery/Etsy

Awww. And also, yeah, you’d better not be trying to catch ’em all!

playerNo2/Etsy

The more knowledge these cards require of Pokémon, the better they get.

playerNo2/Etsy

Honestly, this was the least gross Rhydon idea. It just gets (way) more explicit from here.

FoxSoupShop/Etsy

If getting Jiggly with it means singing and then going to sleep, that sounds like a perfectly fine Valentine’s Day, too.

AwkWordPrints/Etsy

Simple and effective. Super effective.

Itsanerdthing/Etsy

No pressure or anything.

FancyIndividual/Etsy

If you put up with that kind of snoring, you deserve a lot more in return than just another Valentine’s Day card.

CherryCatsWorld/Etsy

Just the cutest.

GenLeChat/Etsy

For full effect, make sure you run away right after giving your SO this card.

FoxSoupShop/Etsy

Maybe uncomfortably warm, but that’s neither here nor there.

FoxSoupShop/Etsy

Trubbish is a deep cut, and we love it.

GenLeChat/Etsy

This one brought the biggest, dumbest smile to my face. It really is the best.

TheNerdMonster/Etsy

Need to take your Pokémon Valentine’s Day game to the next level? Pair one of those cards with one of these amazing Pokémon rings!

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