As a child, I had a LOT of friends. I befriended everyone, and I specifically remember my Mom sitting me down and telling me that it’s ok. I actually don’t have to be friends with everyone and I should start being measurably nice instead of just nice to a fault. She also told me I could afford to be picky with who I chose to surround myself with.
Big lessons for a little kid. Yeah, you could say people used to take advantage of my kindness, and I also was on a quest to make everyone feel special back in the day.
Fast forward to 2019, and I still struggle with being measurably nice, but I no longer struggle with not having very many friends at age 28.
Once I hit my early twenties and started focusing full tilt on my career and success, I lost everyone except Emily (she’s been with me since the nineties and is basically my mom’s fourth child so she’s just stuck with me forever at this point).
The old expression it’s lonely at the top never holds truer than when you start building companies, as you start losing friends. And you know what? That’s ok.
When you decide you want to pick the path of success, you learn that it doesn’t always mean other people in your life pick that path too. In fact, most won’t and don’t. Success is goddamn hard, and putting in work is not for the faint of heart.
The sad reality is that society conditions everyone to think that there’s the normal way and then, well, that’s it. There only is one way. The standard of thinking is you attend college, work a totally baseborn job, and you continue to work at that job until you retire and then you don’t and that’s it.
It’s virtually impossible for anyone to understand you if you don’t want to go down the normal route, no matter how much you try to explain. You won’t ever sway their opinions or change their minds, and that’s ok. You can go your own way.
You’ll also encounter the people that are just completely and utterly jealous of you for taking the leap and going after what you want instead of being stuck in predictability. The people that wish they had the courage and focus to be entrepreneurs.
The people that start talking about you behind your back, or point out any failures you have, or downplay your successes. It happens, and it’s eye opening. And it’s ok to walk away from those people.
You choose who you surround yourself with, always and forever. Make sure you only choose to surround yourself with the people that will always cheer you on from the bottom of their hearts and build you up to the best of their abilities. And if you find that it’s only your mom, or your very best friend that’s left in the end, that’s ok.
Bre is a female millennial go getter residing in New York. One part entrepreneur, one part geek, she obtained her degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology.
She has held some exciting roles in both fashion as a designer working for brands like Victoria’s Secret and Henri Bendel, as well as in ad tech working for publishers like Ziff Davis.
Today she operates her own luxury label Bre Avery, along with Chip Chick Media which reaches millions of women each month.
Bre is passionate about teaching women how to build a business and be an entrepreneur, in addition to keeping her readers informed of the latest technology trends and exciting products to improve their lifestyles.
You can send Bre a message here.