This Dad Wants The Internet To Tell Him If It’s Wrong To Let His Son Keep The Ashes Of His Twin Who Passed Away

“I say this with a genuine heart but it sounds like your daughter needs therapy. And your son doesn’t deserve more trauma by her inability to handle her feelings.”

“Overall it sounds like she ended up feeling left out of a twin thing that she’s probably struggled with since they were born. She needs therapy.”


“Your daughter probably feels left out as the ‘non-twin’ and with the 3 of you (parents and brother) making this decision without her input.”

“He was her brother too after all. It would probably have been kinder to discuss it as a family however you’re his parents and get to make that decision regardless of anyone else.”


“Grief affects people in different and sometimes unexpected ways. Jane may be feeling that since you and Pollux made this decision together, that she has been excluded from an important family moment concerning her deceased brother.”

“She may be feeling that you think she loved him less and didn’t need to be included.”

“I mean, I don’t know any of y’all, but considering she was the odd-one-out when both twins were alive, this may even replicate feelings she’s had for a long time. Is any of that possible?”

“I think letting Pollux keep the ashes is totally reasonable, but it should have been a family discussion to get to that point.”


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