Childhood abuse and trauma, in any form, can have a lasting impact into adulthood. This man’s suffering followed him throughout his life and romantic relationships. Now, he is faced with an agonizing decision rooted in his trauma.
“I was physically and psychologically abused by my father growing up. He would beat me frequently and severely and repeatedly tell me I was a failure,” the man said.
His mother was present and abused as well. When the man saw this, he would try to comfort his mother. When he was abused, though, she did not intervene at all.
The abuse was far-reaching in his childhood. The man was not allowed to socialize at all, so he did not develop any social skills.
“I had no life experience outside studying. Nevertheless, I had good grades and was accepted into a top university,” he explained. However, once the man left for college and had more freedom, he was still unable to make friends.
“At the time, I thought it was because I was ugly. But, in hindsight, it was because I was too socially awkward and lacking in self-confidence,” the man reflected.
After graduating, the man found his first girlfriend. But, being starved for affection for so long made him “needy” in the girl’s eyes. So, she ended up breaking up with him.
“I spent the next six years leading a mostly solitary life. I was too alienated from society to manage a real job, but I did a lot of volunteer work,” the man explained.
He mainly worked with the homeless and became an advisor for disadvantaged communities. Still unable to make friends, though, he struggled with feelings of isolation and depression. His experience as an advisor was fulfilling, though, and pushed him to pursue law school.
“Although I was still very socially awkward, I managed to meet a sweet girl at college who agreed to date me. She later told me that she did so because she felt sorry for me,” the man mentioned.