Chip Chick
A 30-year-old woman has a boyfriend who is the same age as she is, and they’ve been dating for around 5 years.
They have chatted about what their future together would look like, but they haven’t made any concrete plans around that.
The largest problem in their relationship is that for every single holiday, birthday, and special occasion, she winds up wildly disappointed.
“The conflict comes from my boyfriend loving to give big gifts,” she explained. “Which is really generous, except that the way in which he showers his mom and sister (married) with them makes me feel lesser.”
“Yes, I get nice gifts too and I’m very grateful and accepting.”
“But the discomfort arises when, every time, his mom and sister get equal, if not much greater (eg. diamonds, designer bags), gifts from him than I do.”
“Also, on occasions when they’re given a budget, they consistently exceed the budget by a healthy amount. All fine, he doesn’t care.”
“But he outright refused for me to do the same when I meekly asked once. It didn’t feel great. And vacations are similar – equal or greater spending on vacations with them vs me.”
She does think that she has some self-worth and jealousy problems, which are leading her to feel like she’s less important than her boyfriend’s mom and sister are to him.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
