Chip Chick
Eventually, he spilled the beans to her on everything he’s worried about, and she was nothing but kind and compassionate about all of his worries.
His fiancée gets where he is coming from, but she does not feel that his concerns can’t be worked through.
His fiancée reassured him that their children would never need to learn how to speak Cantonese, and she’s positive that they can work together to find the best way to raise them to appreciate their roots.
Although his fiancée tried to ease his fears, he keeps having them, and he’s now focused on the potential problem of he and his fiancée potentially having to make changes to who they really are to make one another happy in a family setting.
He’s finding himself envious of people who are in a relationship that come from the same culture, and what if he’s making some kind of mistake with pursuing a family with his fiancée?
He does not know why he’s had such a change of heart, but if his heart is not all in on getting married, he’s doubting the fact that he should.
“To break up, beyond the grave emotional tailwinds, would be a nightmare to untangle our lives,” he said.
“Not to mention the humiliation with our friends and families. Also the torment it would cause her at age 29 to have to start her romance life over; it would be like I took away her best years and left her for dead.”
“Looking back I realize how selfish and ignorant I was to avoid this topic, to not ask myself these important questions early on, especially before proposing, but even if I did, my answers back then may have been different than they are today.”
He’s afraid that he’s simply settling for her and that she is not the perfect woman for him.
“The ultimate question here is should I enter the nightmare of a break-up for the small hopes of a better tomorrow or do I need to simply buck-up and fix my mindset?” he asked.
