Chip Chick
“He will tell me constantly how I need to work on my weight, how he can’t wait until I lose weight, and how much more attracted to me he will be when that happens.”
“The most hurtful thing said was that he will withhold affection so that I don’t get too complacent.”
“Tbh, I can understand where he comes from. Attraction is attraction, and everyone has a type, but he never told me any of this while we were dating. We occasionally talked about my fitness goals, but he never expressed how he wanted me to lose weight.”
Her husband also pushes her to want to lose weight to motivate herself and that it should be the main goal for her so she can feel more comfortable in her own skin.
Her husband also holds it over her head that if she loses the weight, he will be happier too, and it will improve the connection that they have.
“But it’s just the opposite,” she continued.
“It shatters me. I have told him how it makes me feel. I have never in my life thought that I was unattractive or unworthy of love until he started expressing these feelings.”
“It takes away my desire to care how I look. I barely put thought into my outfits or how I present myself.”
She’s left feeling that she’s not beautiful or good-looking, or worthy. She has pointed out to her husband that his always being on top of her to lose weight makes her not want to do it, and it’s running her self-esteem.
Despite telling this to her husband, he does not understand where she’s coming from, and he won’t own her negative feelings about herself.
“I know that I need to sort through my emotions, but how can I express to him that he’s breaking me instead of encouraging me?” she wondered.
