A 34-year-old guy has been dating his 37-year-old girlfriend for the last 4 years. They do live with one another, along with his girlfriend’s child, who has special needs.
He adores his girlfriend’s child, and he is currently the one financially supporting all three of them.
He pays between 85 to 90% of all of their living expenses, and he has a full-time job working between 45 to 50 hours every single week.
He pays their rent, he pays for their utilities, and he pays into a budget that they both share, yet his girlfriend doesn’t really put any money into that shared budget.
“She does freelance work, but just enough to cover her bills (credit cards, car payment, etc.) and then contribute a little to the shared budget,” he explained.
“Maybe works 10-20 hours per week. Life is not easy, but we do have some great times and are creating a really great environment for her child to grow up, which is great.”
“I’ve tried to express my need for financial support in a reasonable way that still allows her to be present as a mom, but when I do, we fall into a circular argument that goes like – she cannot put in what it will take to help out financially unless we get married.”
He really does not want to marry his girlfriend until they work things out financially and he no longer feels stressed out to the max about having to provide for himself, her, and her child.
His girlfriend also tries to make him feel bad by accusing him of making it seem like she isn’t worth anything unless she’s making money, but that’s not how he feels.