Abby Connolly
When you’ve been dating someone and aren’t really into them, that means it’s time to part ways.
Some people find letting someone down or telling them they aren’t interested really easy, and for others, it’s impossible. Conflict and confrontation are scary, and overall, it’s an uncomfortable situation to be in.
Taking the easy way out and ghosting someone is always an option, but for those of us who have been ghosted, we know how badly it hurts, and it’s a pretty cruel method of ending things with someone. So, here are some tips for letting someone down easily without ghosting or causing a scene.
First, you want to be clear and concise about why you’re ending things with the person you’re seeing. Think about what exactly it is that’s turning you off, whether it’s something they did or simply a mental headspace you’re in. Going over these things before breaking things off with them will make it easier for you to communicate your feelings and keep things in check.
Another valuable tip about letting someone down – don’t procrastinate. You should tell this person how you feel as soon as possible. Dragging things out to wait for the “right moment” will only send mixed signals and make them feel like everything is fine when it isn’t.
When the big moment comes, and you’re ready to break things off with this person, make your explanation direct and simple. Don’t make things too complicated. You don’t want to beat around the bush when it comes to this kind of stuff.
You also don’t want to be too harsh, so mention some of the positive aspects of the time you shared, then get real.
For instance, you can tell this person, “You’re very nice, and I enjoyed hanging out with you, but sadly I’m not feeling a spark between us.”
Is it uncomfortable to say? Yes! Will it potentially feel cruddy at the moment? Yes! But over time, this person will come to appreciate the fact that you communicated what you were feeling versus ghosting them or coming up with a fake excuse as to why you can’t be with them.
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