He’s Talking About How He Believes A Lot of People Adopt The Wrong Mindset With Dating, Because They Just Treat Dates Like Job Interviews

fotofabrika - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

It’s often been said that job interviews and dates are pretty similar to each other. For one, both require you to dress up and be engaging.

But don’t get the two twisted. Unlike a job interview, the purpose of dating is to find a partner you can build a life with. You’re not trying to fill a position in the office.

TikToker Sonny Pluto (@stillfrompluto) stitched a video from a creator named Annie Shaffer (@anniekshaffer). In her video, Annie touches on the types of questions that some men ask women  on dates, such as: “What do you bring to the table? Why should I commit to you? What do you offer me that other women don’t?

Sonny is talking about how he believes a lot of people adopt the wrong mindset to dates because they treat dates as if they are job interviews, and the above questions are an example of that.

When dating is approached from an interviewing perspective, all chances of defining a future relationship with the other person are lost, which is why many people aren’t successful in finding a suitable partner.

Sonny claims that the goal of going on first and second dates is to determine whether or not the attraction you feel toward the person is more than surface level and whether or not the interest is mutual, not to figure out what benefits this person can give you.

“And if you ask questions like, ‘What do you bring to the table?’ you encourage a lot of people to bring up this false narrative about themselves as opposed to simply deciding what you want from a relationship and seeing whether or not that person embodies what you want,” he said.

A first date should be nothing more than a friendly conversation. Bombarding them with questions about their qualifications doesn’t just prevent you from seeing if the person you’re on a date with is compatible.

It’s also a major turn-off and ruins the vibes.

fotofabrika – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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