Dating someone and sharing a life with someone who has kids from a previous marriage comes with many challenges.
One woman recently put her foot down and told her boyfriend he wasn’t allowed to move into her apartment because she didn’t want to deal with his kids.
She’s 28-years-old and has been dating her 30-year-old boyfriend for a little over a year. She and her boyfriend have a fairly casual relationship. She told him she wasn’t interested in anything serious from the beginning, and he agreed to keep things casual.
Although they’ve been with each other for over a year, she and her boyfriend haven’t discussed anything related to commitment, being together long-term, or sharing a place. That is, until now.
Her boyfriend has been living with his brother while she has her own place. Her boyfriend has two kids, a nine-year-old daughter and a seven-year-old son from a previous relationship, and they stay with him every other weekend. She hasn’t met them yet but has heard some stories about them misbehaving, including when they broke a laptop.
Recently, her boyfriend asked out of the blue if he could move into her apartment. She considered it for a second because he’s fairly laid-back. However, she realized that wherever he lived, his kids would have to stay there too, and she is strongly against having kids in her home, as she considers it her sanctuary.
Once she said no, her boyfriend started begging her to reconsider. He told her that his brother wanted to move his girlfriend in and, therefore, wanted to kick him out of his current place. He told her he couldn’t afford to get his own place and that since she owned her apartment, he could save some rent money for a while if he stayed with her.
“I stood stern on my decision and told him while I understood his situation, I don’t want to open my home to kids,” she explained.
“He tried saying how it’s just four to six days a month, and he will make sure they behave.”