She’s Secretly Disappointed That Her Mom Survived Cancer Because Of How Tumultuous Her Childhood Was, And She Feels Like She Just Can’t Escape Her Mom

When she became a mother, it put everything from her childhood into perspective and made her realize just how horrible her mother’s behavior toward her had been throughout the years.

She couldn’t understand how a mother could act that way toward her own daughter. It was inconceivable to her.

Once she gained this clarity, she decided to stop communicating with her mother indefinitely. She didn’t want to put up with her mother’s abusive behavior anymore.

Two years later, her mother finally stopped using drugs, which she’d pleaded with her to do for her entire life.

She was thrilled for her mother, and eventually, her mother contacted her.

Understandably, she felt some hesitancy about talking to her mother again, but she gave her the opportunity to prove that she had changed, hoping that they could build a healthy relationship and recover from the negativity in the past.

“It did not take me long to realize that it wasn’t the drugs that she was on that made her act the way she did toward me. The same drugs I had excused her behavior because of before. ‘She doesn’t know what she is doing, or ‘She’ doesn’t understand; it’s the drugs; she can’t help it.’ Well, no, it was not the drugs,” she explained.

While the substances her mother used intensified the toxic behavior, they weren’t the cause of it.

The abuse and guilt trips repeated all over again, so she made the choice to end communication with her mother once more, this time intending it to be permanent.

Before this, she expressed to her mother that she hoped she would continue to have success with her recovery, but she could no longer subject herself to this mistreatment.

Plus, she was in the healing process from the abuse her mother had inflicted on her as a child while trying to be a wonderful mother to her son.

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