He’s Not On Board With His Girlfriend’s Dream Of Being A Stay-At-Home Mom, Since That Will Prevent Them From Retiring Early
Retiring early and not being stuck toiling away in corporate America is a dream for many, but it takes being financially savvy to accomplish it.
Gaining the ability to retire on the early side is something this 28-year-old man and his 24-year-old girlfriend are looking forward to in the future.
They’ve been dating for more than two years, and a couple of weeks back, his girlfriend brought up another dream of hers, which is being a stay-at-home mom.
This was eye-opening to him since he says his girlfriend has never talked about this before. Meanwhile, she swears that she addressed this early on, so she got mad at him for not remembering.
Overlooking their disagreement with that minor detail, he’s not on board with his girlfriend wanting to stay at home and give up her job.
“I’ve always mentioned that I want us to both retire early so we can spend more time with each other and family,” he explained.
“We both currently make roughly the same and about upper-middle-class income, but shifting to having one income would severely hinder that goal (if not completely void it).”
He pointed out how early retirement will not be in the cards for them anymore, and his girlfriend hit back that it’s not her goal, but his. He thought that was rude since he envisioned this would be something they could do together.
If his girlfriend wants to head down the path of being a stay-at-home mom, he will be stuck having to be the breadwinner.
carballo – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Supporting his girlfriend and their future children is an enormous burden, and should he ever get laid off, it will risk their whole family’s security.
While he acknowledges that he makes enough to support a family, he wants a certain “quality of life” that will no longer be attainable.
“I know being a SAHM is a full-time job on its own, but I also know it tapers off as the child ages, [and] the workload gets reduced,” he added.
“I tried to compromise by asking if she could find a WFH job (easily doable in her industry) or part-time job after 3-5 years, but she got upset, saying the choice on if or when to go back should be hers.”
“This choice heavily impacts my life, too; shouldn’t I have some say in this? I completely respect that she wants to be SAHM and want her to for at least a few years, but she makes it seem like she’s a martyr for this decision and won’t let me provide my input. How can I get her to have a meaningful discussion with me so we can compromise instead of it being one-sided?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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