These Wedding Guests Opened Up About The “Trashiest” Weddings They Have Ever Been To
While most weddings on social media might appear straight out of a fairy tale, the online community has also proved that there is no shortage of train wreck weddings.
One Reddit user recently asked people to recall the “trashiest wedding” they had ever been to. The tales range from cringe-worthy to downright inappropriate.
A Pig Exploded
“It was a really old friend of my wife’s wedding. My wife had not seen her in years but was still invited. The guy she was marrying was shirtless, wore black jeans, and his arms were covered in barbwire tattoos and quotes you’d find on skeleton memes.”
“It was quickly apparent that my wife and I were the only ones in attendance who did not live in a trailer park and practiced normal hygiene.”
“They were roasting what I thought was a suckling pig on a spit. But, as it cooked, I noticed its stomach swelling.”
“I asked the best man if it was a properly slaughtered pig. The best man proceeded to regale me with a tale of how he and the groom got plastered the night before, climbed into a nearby farm, and stole the pig.”
“It just so happened that while we were discussing the groom’s recent crime, the pig’s stomach exploded. Blood and guts poured out in enough quantities to put out the fire.”
“My wife and I had already given each other a look before this. Needless to say, we beelined for the car and left.”
matilda553 – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
“We later found out the cops showed up and arrested the groom and his best man once the farmer they stole from realized his prized pig was missing. The groom tried to fight the cops and got tased. He made it easy for them by already being shirtless.”
A Bad Beach Wedding
“The wedding was on the beach behind Hooters. The officiant stood next to a trash bin. Then, as if it was planned, the trash collector pulled up during the vows.”
“Did he wait to change the bag? Absolutely not.”
“Children at the wedding swarmed the couple like the flies around the trash can just after the kiss– stepping all over her dress. She bent over to adjust her sandal, and a pack of Marlboro Reds fell out of the bust along with her right boob.”
“It felt like we were rubbernecking instead of witnessing a marriage.”
A Wasted Wedding Party
“The ceremony was comprised of the immediate family followed by a reception with all guests in a relatively nice hotel banquet hall.”
“An hour into the reception, the open bar was completely closed because multiple guests were throwing up in the bathroom sinks and causing them to flood.”
“The groom was so wasted even before the ceremony that he was blackout by the time of the reception. During the first dance, he kept his hands in his cargo pant khakis the entire time and ate dinner sitting on the floor in the corner of the hall while the bride sat at the head table alone.”
“Then, about two hours in, the groom randomly left and slept at their house while the bride stayed in the newlywed suite by herself. They are now separated, as you may have assumed by this point.”
The Groom Was Exposed
“This one’s a twofer! The bride’s best friend– the maid of honor– used the wedding to announce that she was pregnant with the groom’s child.”
“Cut to the divorce after two and a half years of trying to ‘make it work,’ and the groom got married to the previous maid of honor. But, then the now ex-wife has announced that she is pregnant with the groom’s child!”
Driveways And Dog Poop
“A coworker of mine got married in her driveway. On the invitation, it said that everyone had to wear the color purple, and they served KFC with hostess cupcakes for dessert.”
“The music was a boom box playing the local light rock station. The worst part was that she let her dogs crap all over the driveway during the reception and no one ever picked up the poop.”
“We all just weirdly hopped around the driveway in our variety of purple hues.”
Too Much Was Seen
“The groom’s best man went around with a naked photo of the groom. He showed everyone, including the bride and the groom’s family.”
“The worst part was that there were kids at the wedding, including the bride’s very young son. Plus, it was not a small photo on like his phone either. It was a huge freaking canvas of the groom nude.”
Have you ever been to a wedding gone wrong?
To read the entire Reddit thread, visit the link here.
If true crime defines your free time, this is for you: join Chip Chick’s True Crime Tribe.
More About:Weddings