His In-Laws Picked A New Assisted Living Facility That’s Going To Cost $10,000 A Month, And His Wife Says They Should Pay For Most of That

rawpixel.com - stock.adobe.com-  illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
rawpixel.com - stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

Watching your parents get older is stressful enough. Having to make the decision to place them in an assisted living facility is extremely difficult and surprisingly expensive.

One man had to put his foot down after finding out that he and his wife would pay most of the fees for his in-laws’ assisted living instead of her siblings.

His wife is one of five siblings, and they recently had to make the difficult decision to move their parents into assisted living since they can no longer care for themselves. He figured that the cost to move his wife’s parents wouldn’t be too big since it would be split between the five siblings. However, he was wrong.

His in-laws don’t qualify for government assistance, and one of their biggest assets is their house, which his wife and her siblings are very against selling. So, they decided to split the costs of assisted living. But, they did not split the costs evenly. 

“They started to look into different facilities, and admittedly, I didn’t help because I figured the five adult siblings could handle it, and I was never close to my in-laws,” he explained.

“They found one that was perfect, and my wife was very excited when she told me about it. I was less than thrilled when I found out our contribution will be roughly $3,000 upfront, then $5,000 a month.”

When he heard he and his wife would be spending $5,000 a month on her parents’ facility, he thought she and her siblings recklessly picked out a very expensive place that cost around $25,000. He joked that his in-laws must be moving next to Elon Musk.

But then, he discovered that the facility cost $10,000 a month, and he and his wife would carry the bulk of the costs. 

“She then told me that we’re going to cover the lion’s share of the costs because we make more than her siblings,” he said.

rawpixel.com – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual people

“That was the beginning of a week of texts, phone, and in-person arguments. She argues that her siblings make less money combined than we do, and some are single, so it would impact them more, thus so it’s only fair we pay more.”

His wife also said that the facility her family picked out was mid-tier in terms of quality and that if they chose a cheaper place, they could jeopardize her parents’ safety. 

He is still very upset with his wife and thinks that no matter what, she and her siblings should be evenly splitting the costs. With the situation they have set up now, one of her brothers will only pay $300 a month while he and his wife pay $5,000. 

This situation especially concerns him because his own parents are getting older, and as an only child, the day will come when he’ll have to support them, too.

“I also argued that if five people can’t afford that place, they need to lower their standards,” he added.

“That started a circular argument for hours between cost and safety. I couldn’t take it anymore.”

Ever since arguing about the facility, he and his wife have been on the outs, and he’s been sleeping on the couch. This whole debacle has drained him emotionally.

Should he accept the expensive monthly facility payment or insist that his wife and her siblings split the costs evenly?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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