She Doesn’t Want To Help Her Husband By Co-Signing A Loan With Him Because He Never Treated Her Like A Financial Equal Or Put Her Name On The Deed To Their House
This 30-year-old woman and her husband, 40, have been together for a decade and have kids. Right after they met, her now-husband inherited a house in his hometown. Paperwork was being processed while their relationship progressed. They eventually moved into the house and have lived there to this day, but her name has never been listed on the deed.
When they first started dating, her husband earned a much higher salary than hers. He earned $75,000 a year, and she earned $18 an hour working for an insurance company. While her husband paid their household expenses, she paid for groceries, daycare, and medical bills.
“There’s always been an uneven distribution of what he paid versus what I paid. I always felt like I contributed 100% of my paycheck with no extra money left to splurge on myself (and I maxed out credit cards keeping up with our needs),” she said.
She struggled to contribute to their expenses, and it felt unfair that her husband could have easily paid for everything himself. He demanded that she continue working after having kids, but she’d pleaded with him to allow her to stay home to care for their kids. However, he rejected the idea.
Whenever she suggested that her name be added to the deed, her husband claimed it was ridiculous, adding that he couldn’t understand why she’d want a mortgage listed on her credit report.
She was furious because her husband wasn’t being honest. Even though he underestimated her intelligence and didn’t realize she knew she didn’t have to be listed on the mortgage if she was listed on the deed to the house.
“A few years ago, he applied to refinance the home and was denied. I don’t know any details other than it was denied. The purpose of the refinance was to add an addition to the home,” she explained.
They’d been hoping to add another bedroom to the house, and last night, her husband suggested applying for a loan. When she asked if he thought he’d be approved, he told her if she agreed to co-sign on the loan, he’d be approved, and she was stunned at this idea.
“I’ve worked so hard to make enough money to keep up with our bills. I make $150,000 a year now, and he makes $95,000 yearly. I finally feel like I make enough to have a say in financial decisions,” she shared.
Svitlana Ozirna – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
It understandably angers her that throughout their relationship and marriage, her husband never saw her as an equal who should have had enough agency to weigh in on their finances. In her view, her husband acted like she was a kid, not his wife and partner.
Over the years, her husband claimed they didn’t have the money to take trips or upgrade items that needed to be replaced. When she told him she wanted to look at their finances to see if there was room in the budget, he said he was humiliated and didn’t want her to see them.
She took her annoyance as motivation to save money on her own so she didn’t have to ask her husband for money if she wanted to buy things. Later, she told her husband she wouldn’t co-sign on the loan with him.
Do you think she did the right thing?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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