7 Signs You’re Dating A Man-Child
Dating Is Like A Dance
It takes two equally invested and committed people in order to form a healthy partnership. But if you often feel more like a babysitter than a significant other, you’re probably dealing with a man-child.
At first, your boyfriend’s fun-loving and carefree attitude might’ve seemed exciting, endearing, and even refreshing.
Then, once the honeymoon phase ended and reality started to settle in, you realized just how frustrating it was to deal with his kid-like behavior.
Here Are 7 Red Flags That Indicate You’re With A Man-Child
Man-children are typically emotionally immature and resistant to taking on responsibility. In other words, they struggle with basic adulting and can make a once enjoyable relationship utterly exhausting.
If this sounds like your current situation, here are seven red flags that suggest you’re dating a man-child.
1. His Place Is A Disaster
Does your boyfriend’s living space seem more like a teen’s messy bedroom than an adult’s functional home? There might be laundry scattered everywhere, dirty dishes piled up in the sink, or even a mystery smell that never goes away.
There are two possible reasons for this. A man-child could (somehow) not even notice the mess. Or, he expects someone, likely you, to clean it up for him.
If his idea of tidying up is spraying air freshener instead of taking out the trash or kicking his dirty clothes under the bed rather than running a load of laundry, you’re dating a grown man who never learned how to clean up after himself.
2. He’s Never Financially Stable
A man-child might always be “broke,” yet there’s somehow still money for new video games, takeout, or the latest gadget that he just needed to buy.
To be clear, plenty of people struggle with finances in today’s economy, and that’s understandable in the wake of the rising cost of living. However, man-children are different.
They struggle with managing their money responsibly, hopping from one job to the next, dodging bills, or remaining chronically unemployed. When due to poor decisions, this pattern of financial instability is a bad sign, especially if your boyfriend expects you to bail him out when things go south.
3. He’s Unreliable And Full Of Excuses
If you need someone to count on, don’t expect a man-child to be there for you. He is constantly unreliable and will miss important events or fail to follow through on promises.
Your boyfriend is probably a man-child if he comes up with laundry lists of excuses, too. He’ll swear he intended to be there, but something out of his control got in the way, like traffic or some emergency that he conveniently didn’t mention earlier.
The worst part? When you try to call him out, he downplays the situation and makes you feel like you’re overreacting.
4. He Doesn’t Know How To Complete Typical Adult Tasks
For man-children, simple tasks that most adults handle without a second thought are totally baffling. Your boyfriend might claim he doesn’t know how to schedule a doctor’s appointment, cook a basic meal without your assistance, or even set the table for dinner.
And instead of trying to learn, he avoids the task altogether and finds a way to dump the responsibility on you. This cycle of helplessness and weaponized incompetence can become exhausting, making you feel like a personal assistant as opposed to a partner.
5. You Constantly Have To Nag Or Remind Him
You probably never wanted to be “that” person who’s always reminding or outright nagging your partner to get things done. Yet, it becomes the norm if you’re dating a man-child.
You have to remind him to pay his bills, dress appropriately (or even just take a shower) before heading out of the house, and tidy up after himself.
Over time, you probably become frustrated with yourself, too, for somehow landing yourself in this situation. In a balanced relationship, you shouldn’t feel as if you’re raising someone.
6. He’s Unable To Handle Criticism
Most people in relationships with man-children don’t just keep their mouths shut. You’ve probably tried to talk to your boyfriend about his behavior before. However, even the mildest feedback might’ve sent him into a spiral of defensiveness.
He didn’t listen or make any efforts to improve. Instead, he may have taken your words as a personal attack, accusing you of “always being on his case.”
Mature people are able to handle constructive criticism and put it into action. A man-child just sees it as a threat, making it practically impossible for your relationship to grow.
7. He Talks The Talk But Doesn’t Walk The Walk
Finally, when you first started seeing your boyfriend, he might’ve been filled with grand ideas and big promises about your future. But you’ve hung around waiting, and when it came to actually following through, he just fell flat.
Your boyfriend may talk about furthering his career yet never takes any steps to back it up. Or, he insists he wants a serious relationship but fails to show true commitment and put in the effort to build one.
Mature, responsible, and emotionally-available partners aren’t all talk. They prove their intentions through action. A man-child, on the other hand, strings you along.
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