5 Ways To Keep A New Relationship Healthy
Little Missteps In A New Relationship Can Lead To Big Problems Down The Line
The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. We’re usually filled with hope and excitement at the start of a relationship, but remember that it’s also a time when small missteps can lead to bigger problems down the line.
Emotions will eventually run high, and when expectations are unclear, even the most well-intentioned couples can find themselves on shaky ground.
Here Are 5 Ways To Keep Your New Relationship Healthy
That’s why it’s so important to lay a strong foundation early. Healthy relationships don’t just happen; they are built through mindset shifts, open communication, and mutual understanding.
So, whether you’re only a few weeks in or starting to see some real long-term potential with your partner, here are five tips for keeping your relationship healthy.
1. Adopt A Teammate Mentality Instead Of Keeping Score
The idea of a 50/50 relationship might sound fine in theory, but it can actually do more harm than good. When you focus too much on keeping things exactly equal, it’s easy to fall into a pattern of keeping score. So, you could start tallying points against your partner based on the distribution of relationship responsibilities, saying things like, “I did this for them, but they didn’t do that for me.”
That kind of thinking will only breed resentment. Instead, it’s much healthier to approach your relationship as a team. Realize that sometimes, one of you will carry more of the weight, and that’s okay. Couples are supposed to support each other, not keep score over who did what.
And when you both give 100%, you’ll create a sense of trust that makes it much easier to navigate the ups and downs together.
2. Treat This Relationship Like A Fresh Start
Sometimes, previous relationships leave us heartbroken, and it’s completely normal to hold onto emotional baggage from them. However, if you want your new relationship to last, you need to give it a clean slate.
Your new partner isn’t responsible for what someone else did to you. So, while it’s okay to share your fears or insecurities with them, try not to just project your past hurts onto your current relationship.
If you find yourself struggling to let go of old wounds, talk about them with your partner, consider therapy, or even work with a relationship coach. Healing is a process, but the more you’re able to separate the past from the present, the healthier and more genuine your relationship will be.
3. Avoid The Trap Of Comparing Your Partner To Your Ex
Similarly, relationships are not supposed to be a competition. And when you compare your current partner to someone from your past, you are essentially setting them up to fail.
Absolutely no two people are exactly alike, and neither are relationships, so you can’t expect anyone to replicate your ex. Not to mention, such an expectation is just unfair to them.
Your current partner deserves to be seen and appreciated for who they are, not measured against a shadow of someone you once loved. Focus on building something new instead of thinking about what “was.”
4. Build A Habit Of Regular Check-Ins
In the early stages of a relationship, conversation usually flows naturally. But, as time goes on and routines set in, it’s easy to drift into surface-level chit chat. That’s where check-ins come into play.
They don’t have to be formal or even long. The goal is just to set aside some time each week to connect, talk about how you’ve both been feeling, and address any concerns before they have the opportunity to morph into bigger issues. You can do this after work on Monday to start the week strong, or sit down with a glass of wine on Fridays and reboot as you enter the weekend.
No matter how you choose to perform your check-ins, the point is to keep you and your partner on the same page emotionally.
5. Lead With Grace, For Your Partner And Yourself
No one is perfect, so you and your partner will inevitably mess up and hurt each other from time to time. There will be awkward moments, misunderstandings, and instances where one of you says or does the wrong thing. That is normal.
The key, then, is to lead with grace. As you and your partner get to know each other on the deepest levels, give them and yourself the benefit of the doubt. You are both learning how to love and support each other, and that takes patience. Be kind and understanding throughout the process, and your connection will grow that much stronger because of it.
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