Her Husband Won’t Go To Therapy With Her, So She Told Him To Move Out Of Their House, But Now She’s Questioning Her Decision

This 28-year-old woman has been with her 33-year-old husband for close to 9 years, and they only tied the knot 3 years ago.
Her husband truly is her best friend, and she says that he’s motivated, considerate, and sweet.
For as long as she has known her husband, she has struggled greatly with her physical and mental health, but with therapy, medication, and surgery, she has improved a ton.
She recently was able to finish her college degree, and then she got 2 different jobs. But, 7 months afterward, she had to quit one of her jobs because of issues with her health.
She currently works just part-time, but with the remainder of her time, she has been devoted to doing all of the chores around the house and supporting her husband as he advances his career.
“We’ve been talking for a few years now about having kids and agreed we will wait until we were financially and emotionally balanced- as we achieved both, the planning became more concrete,” she explained.
“4 months ago, He told me that he hesitate to have kids with me, saying that looking back at the rough time we (but mostly I, according to him) had, he doesn’t know if we’ll be able to deal with the difficulties of having children, and that he’s not sure I’ll make a good mother. He was very upset and said he didn’t know what to do.”
She immediately found a therapist for her husband to talk to, and although this is something her husband has been really opposed to in the past, he said he would go to therapy after she insisted.
She then found another therapist to counsel her and her husband together, and they began realizing throughout their joint sessions that they had been keeping a lot of things from one another in an effort to not insult the other person.

andrey – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
She has also discovered through their counseling that her husband is so exhausted by her own problems, and he carries around a lot of guilt for not being able to make her better.
This has, in turn, caused her husband to work too much and not open up to her. She believes her husband is “trying to fix” her in lieu of just being there for her, and he also turns a blind eye to the headway that she has made.
Milestones that she thinks are things to be proud of are things her husband sees as her being weak.
“After 6 meetings (and one therapist-switch prior), he told me he can’t see us getting past it; he doesn’t believe the process will help and, therefore, can’t fully commit to it,” she said.
“I told him that I have faith in us and believe we could become stronger as a couple and as individuals – but I need him to be willing to work with me; he told me he can’t, so I asked him to leave our apartment.”
Her husband moved out as she requested, and a day later, she doesn’t know if this means they’re breaking up or staying together. She does feel conflicted about their relationship, as a part of her thinks her husband abandoned her without making any effort.
But, another part of her acknowledges that she has a lot of issues that can be viewed as “baggage,” and her husband has forever been there for her throughout the worst times in her life. She’s left wondering if she should provide her husband with some kind of ultimatum, let him have more space, try to contact him, or give herself a set amount of time to pack it up regardless of his reaction.
What option do you think she should go with?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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