These People Are Sharing Their Best Pieces Of Advice For Marriage, Because You Know It’s Not Always Smooth Sailing After Saying “I Do”
Sharing a life with someone is far from easy. Sure, after saying, “I do,” you will probably have a ton of happy newlywed moments. But then, as time goes on, you will inevitably encounter challenges that require a lot of talking, listening, compromising, understanding, and sacrificing– which can be tough to adjust to.
That’s not to say marriage isn’t worth it. Yes, it may be hard– but marrying your best friend might also be the best decision you ever make.
Regardless, though, we can all use some marriage tips for when things don’t go so smoothly.
So, whether you are about to tie the knot or have been married for decades, here is some tried and true marriage advice from spouses around the globe.
Just Be Nice
“Happily married for over 25 years, and the best advice I can give is honestly, be nice. Yup, just be nice.”
“Say thank you. Say please. Appreciate every little thing they do for you. Compliment each other. Hold hands. Listen when they talk.”
“Just be kind to each other.”
Wollwerth Imagery – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
“80% of a successful marriage is just being a good roommate.”
Prioritize Effective Communication
“The point of an argument is to come to a conclusion, not to win. Similarly, it’s not me against you. It’s me and you against the problem.”
“We have a neutral place to discuss what we are arguing about. We call it a couch talk.”
“So, if we get to a point where we are yelling, we say ‘couch talk.’ Sometimes, just saying this is enough to reach a resolution without visiting the couch.”
“There are rules on the couch– sitting facing each other, no interruptions when one is speaking, and for sure, an apology is in order on one side or the other. I’ve been married 30 years now.”
“You never want to just fight and go back and forth. Sometimes, people say the wrong thing or hit a nerve, or disagree. It’s okay, but learn from the moment and move on.”
“In the beginning, sometimes he would get a little defensive and say I was sensitive. But now, he understands that I am sensitive and to watch what he jokes about.”
“It has made our relationship much stronger, and all it took was just using very clear, direct language when someone is upset.”
“Sometimes winning a stupid argument is way stupider than just saying sorry and letting it go.”
Laugh More, Worry Less
“Drop the ego and grow a sense of humor. You would be amazed at how much you can get through together with those two things.”
“This is exactly how my husband and I are. Life is far too short for drama, and I feel lucky to have married someone I can truly laugh with.”
“This can prevent future complications early because you can laugh at the insanity of various situations you find yourself in. Had I done this earlier, my marriage would have survived.”
Don’t Be Afraid To Seek Help
“Counseling is helpful and not just for bad marriages.”
“Therapists can help you avoid accumulating problems and resentments that will become huge issues and give you tools to communicate better and also listen better.”
“And it doesn’t have to be couples therapy. Start with individual therapy, and don’t be afraid to ask for help dealing with things that might look ‘small’– because there is probably something big behind.”
Support Their Interests And Dreams For The Future
“Your spouse is, like you, a human being. They have likes, dislikes, interests, dreams, aspirations, disappointments.”
“Support them in all of those, and remember that you are two individuals held together by love, commitment, and mutual respect. Both of you should maintain your individuality while you are already part of a whole together. Human beings are capable of doing both.”
“Never stop talking about the future. I had a friend tell me about his divorce, and he said one day, they just stopped seeing each other in their futures and stopped talking about it.”
“They stayed married and unhappy for seven more years.”
If you are married, do you agree with these tips? What other advice would you give to engaged or newlywed couples?
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