When someone in your family has an unplanned pregnancy and suddenly decides to become a parent, a lot of relatives usually step up to help them out and adjust to their new responsibilities.
However, if that parent doesn’t eventually get their act together and become more independent, things can get tense and stressful.
One woman recently told her sister she would stop supporting her once she had her second child after she announced she was having another unplanned baby.
She’s married with children and has a sister who is several years younger than her.
When her younger sister was 19, she dropped out of college after getting pregnant with another man’s baby. At the time, she had a decent-paying job and had the resources to help out her sister, so she gave her some money and helped babysit her new niece.
“My niece is five years old now and is basically a bonus kid for my family,” she explained.
“Even my husband’s family has sort of adopted her as one of ours.”
Her family still helps her sister take care of her niece, and now, things are getting a lot busier, as her sister recently revealed that she’s pregnant with a second baby. The father is a man she met on Tinder, who deleted his profile and cut contact with her once she told him she was pregnant.
“I told her that was great, and I hoped that everything would work out for her,” she recalled.
“I added that I would not be giving her money to support her new baby and that I would not be babysitting for her. I am back to work, and I don’t have that freedom anymore.”
She really upset her sister when she told her that she’d continue to do what she’s been doing for her niece but that she’d have to make separate arrangements and plans for her other baby. Then, she told her that if she found out she was spending any of the money intended for her daughter on her new baby, she’d stop helping her entirely.
Her sister told her she had no right to judge how she chose to live her life.
“I’m not,” she explained. “She can do whatever she wants, but she has no right to expect my husband and I to pick up the slack from her refusal to be a responsible person. It didn’t take long for our mother to call me to chew me out for saying what I said.”
Her mom has been very angry with her for saying those things to her sister and told her she was a terrible daughter.
When her mom asked what she’d give her sister in preparation for the baby, she said she’d give her enough money to buy a onesie from Walmart since that’s the only thing her mom gave her each time she had kids.
“She said that if she had more money, she would have given us more,” she added.
“I said she could sell her house up north, now that she lives in Florida, to help support my sister if she is really running out of money. [I know] she isn’t. My dad left her well set up when he passed away.”
Is she being too cold with her sister, or should she stand her ground and not give her any additional money for the new baby?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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