Not long ago, this 32-year-old woman had to keep her distance and set boundaries with her mother, 53. Prior to this, they had just made peace with one another after an argument.
“It has become apparent she only said she was sorry for a previous fight for the holidays, and unless I play along and walk on eggshells, she will continue her bad behavior,” she said.
From childhood, her mother set the expectation for her to emotionally support her. It’s gotten to the point where she needs to protect her own mental health, and she doesn’t want her mother to rely on her for emotional support anymore.
“She is now threatening to ‘reveal’ how awful I am to some extended family,” she explained.
However, she has no idea what evidence her mother could give to their family because, during their last fight, she took the high road and displayed a ton of self-control, careful to avoid saying things she would later wish she hadn’t said.
She didn’t call her mother names or disrespect her in any way. Sadly, her mother didn’t treat her in the same regard.
“I did stick to my convictions and was asking that certain boundaries be respected. I am concerned, though, since she has turned much of the immediate family against me and is actively working to ensure I am isolated,” she explained.
On her end, she saved cruel things her mother had said to her through text messages, emails, and even a horrific voicemail.
In the voicemail, her mother hurled a bunch of awful insults at her, even name-calling her father.
“Within the text messages and emails, I am told that I need mental healthcare (yes, I do, but not for the reasons she thinks, and I’m working on it), and overall, just told flat out that any boundaries I set are unreasonable,” she shared.
Now, if her mother does attempt to turn her extended family members against her, she is debating on sharing the saved messages and the voicemail from her mother as evidence that her mother is the terrible person in this situation, not her.
She acknowledged that whatever horrible things her mother says about her says more about her mother’s character than her own.
Plus, she would refrain from talking poorly about her mother. All she plans to possibly do is to send her family members the messages if her mother did try to spread lies about her, and family members reached out to ask her for her side of what happened.
What advice would you give her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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