She Admits That Having A Child Destroyed Her Marriage
For 12 years now, this woman and her husband, Ben, have been married, and their marriage was absolutely amazing up until they made a choice to have a child.
They welcomed their daughter Hannah into the world three years ago, and that is when everything changed for the worse.
“Our daughter was planned, and we had a wonderful pregnancy together,” she explained. “He came to every appointment and was just a very good partner.”
“The day she was born, a flip switched instantly on our marriage. He had an extremely hard time adjusting.”
“He wanted nothing to do with her; he helped me out but would throw an attitude. He didn’t do well with no sleep and would pick at me and be just terrible.”
Four days after she gave birth, Hannah messed up her bed, and she woke up Ben, asking him to help her clean up.
Ben screamed at her and said she should do it all herself. She was sobbing as she changed Hannah’s sheets, and Hannah started yelling.
She felt terribly helpless, and she doesn’t think she can ever get over that moment in time, even though it happened several years ago.
Throughout Hannah’s first year, Ben was an awful dad, and he claimed he was depressed. They argued nonstop, but after Hannah celebrated her first birthday, everything improved.
Louis-Photo – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Out of nowhere, Ben showed an interest in Hannah and grew into becoming an excellent dad.
Right now, her single complaint is that Ben has zero patience with Hannah and then cops an attitude with her. He frequently loses his cool and sends Hannah to timeout over nothing.
“We just have completely opposite parenting styles, and it’s tearing our marriage apart,” she said.
While Ben has been better, it’s not enough for her to be happy in her relationship. Adding to all this, she feels as if Ben constantly dismisses her feelings or laughs at her, so she is no longer comfortable expressing herself to him.
Now that you have heard her list of complaints about Ben, she insists he’s actually an incredible provider and man overall, but he’s so grouchy, and having Hannah has really ruined their marriage.
“I don’t believe in just giving up and divorcing him either,” she continued. “I’ve given 12 years of marriage and 3 years of dating of my life to him, and I’m not willing to just call it quits.”
“He doesn’t want to go to therapy either. I’m at a brick wall, and I’m unhappy and not sure how to handle this without everyone saying divorce; I’m a fighter.”
“If we weren’t married and didn’t have a child and one on the way, there is no way I’d still be with him. But we aren’t just dating anyone. How can I effectively communicate these issues to him?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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