His Wife’s Getting A Second Job, Even Though They Both Make Six Figures, Since She Loaned Her Brother A Ton Of Money He Hasn’t Paid Back
Loaning money to loved ones rarely works out well and usually ends in a sticky situation. My mom always used to say that if you are considering loaning someone money, make sure you can live with losing the amount they’re asking for in the event they do not pay you back.
This 30-year-old man has a wife who is the same age as him, and a year ago, his wife came to him with a request.
Her brother was in need of money, and so she wanted to loan him an excessive amount of cash. He hesitated, knowing there was basically no way her brother would be able to repay them in a year’s time, but he caved.
“I was doubtful and assumed it was lost money once I gave it,” he explained. “We had a few arguments, so I made the condition we would be both drastically cut our spending until the money was retrieved.”
“She initially agreed but didn’t change her habits (i.e., still buying skin care products [and] clothes). We had another argument again about her spending.”
“I didn’t think it was fair that I had to give up my wants when she didn’t do her fair share; she reassured me her brother is well on track to pay us back and that I “should spend as if we still had the money.” In fact, she insisted that if he could not, she would get a side job.”
The time has come for his wife’s brother to repay them, and as he guessed, they won’t be getting a dime back.
His wife’s brother asked for a couple more months to get them the money, but he doubts they will ever be reimbursed.
His wife burst into tears and began saying sorry to him while applying for second jobs. He feels terrible that his wife is in this pickle.
Big Shot Theory – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
His wife is a hard worker who takes care of their home, and it wasn’t her who spent all of their money.
He told his wife she should wait to apply for another job until he can take another look at the money they do have in the bank.
“She says she wants to [be] “kept accountable,” [and] maybe she’ll “learn to spend more responsibly.” She says she’ll continue to maintain her contribution to the household (~70%) so that I won’t have to make any sacrifices to my quality of life. She only asks that she may quit her second job if she truly can’t manage (currently applying).”
“It doesn’t sit well with me that she has to go out for a second job. Not only that, the only jobs that will accommodate the part-time (weekend) schedule would be lower/minimum paying wages, which at her tax bracket, she would lose about 30-40%.”
“We both make 6-figures. I make about 1.8x as much as her (pre-tax). I recently started my career, which has no retirement plan, and we have a mortgage, want kids soon, hence the aggressive early savings to catch up.”
Additionally, they have loans to pay down, including student loans, and his alone is $80,000.
He has toyed with the idea of picking up another side project in his industry since he will be making what he normally does per house, but his wife feels terrible that he will be sacrificing for her.
He does work four and a half days at his day job, but he uses his weekends to prep his work for the week ahead, so a side gig will impact that.
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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