He Told His Wife To File For Divorce Since He’s Not Going To Make His Daughter Be Adopted By Her

Photo of a handsome charismatic attractive caucasian bearded man, wearing a stylish casual shirt, sitting at home, looking at the camera, smiling friendly and happily
Kateryna - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

This 33-year-old man and his ex share an eight-year-old daughter named Ella, but he’s got full custody of the little girl.

His ex is a hot mess and has failed to visit Ella for the last year, even though she does have court-ordered supervised visits.

Ella’s mom abuses substances, frequently gets arrested, and has a myriad of personal problems. She misses out on visits since she’s either arrested or hospitalized.

When Ella turned two, he began dating his 30-year-old wife, Laura, though Ella does not refer to Laura as her mom.

Ella is desperately hoping that her own mom will get it together and show up for her, and he has Ella seeing a therapist to help her deal with how hard it is.

“Laura knew how things were when we started dating, and she knew how it was when we got married,” he explained.

“I always made it clear that my priority was Ella’s safety, health, and happiness, and I told her I understood if it got to be too much and she didn’t want to commit. But she said she was on board for it all.”

“Only now she’s tired of my ex reappearing every so often, and she wants to adopt Ella, so my ex can’t have any access ever again. She does love Ella and sees her as hers just as much as mine.”

Laura is trying to strong-arm them all into legally getting to be Ella’s mom, as Laura believes that it’s advantageous for them all to make sure Ella’s real mom is pushed out until Ella is 18 and can decide to try to have a relationship with her.

Photo of a handsome charismatic attractive caucasian bearded man, wearing a stylish casual shirt, sitting at home, looking at the camera, smiling friendly and happily
Kateryna – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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The issue is Ella has no interest in Laura adopting her. Should Ella’s mom never improve, Ella still does not want to cut ties with her.

He is happy to do whatever makes Ella happy, and he’s not going to push Ella into saying yes to Laura adopting her.

This makes Laura angry, as they have two children together, and Laura is concerned about the impact Ella’s relationship with her mom will have on their kids.

Laura also believes that Ella could pick her mom over them, which he knows could happen regardless of whether Laura adopts Ella or not.

“And I said it will definitely happen if we force this. Laura and I have discussed this numerous times now, and she told me she doesn’t see our marriage surviving if I won’t talk Ella around or let her do it or get a therapist who will,” he added.

“She said she will not keep being just the stepmom when Ella’s mom won’t put her first, while she has been and doesn’t get the benefit of legal stability of adoption.”

“She said I only had two options and needed to decide which I wanted. I told her to divorce me then because I’m not forcing the adoption on Ella.”

Laura was blindsided by his response, and she admitted she figured that he would be willing to convince Ella to do what she wants.

Laura then accused him of not caring about their relationship, which is not true. He reminded Laura that she basically gave him an ultimatum, and it’s outside of his control if she files for divorce.

He’s left wondering if it was wrong of him to tell Laura to go ahead and file for divorce, considering the fact that he’s not going to make Ella go along with the adoption plan.

What do you think?

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