Her Boyfriend Is Sleeping Outside In A Tent Because The Sound Of Her Breathing Keeps Him Up At Night
This 27-year-old woman moved in with her 31-year-old boyfriend seven months ago. Before that, they spent the night together at least three or four times each week.
They never had any issues before, but two months ago, her boyfriend said he can’t fall asleep, since the sound of her breathing keeps him up at night.
Also, he pointed out that she snores on occasion when she’s congested and sick, and that is irritating to him as well.
“Sometimes I take a shower, go to the bathroom, or plug in my phone too late, and it wakes him. We have slept apart for the past month or so,” she explained.
“I hate it, but respect his need for better rest. I sleep in the bedroom, and he was sleeping on the floor of the living room on a twin mattress.”
“I feel horrible about this and offer for me to sleep in the living room or at the very least for us to trade on and off, but he says he prefers it in there.”
They do have another bedroom, but it connects to the bathroom, so her boyfriend can’t sleep in there as an option, since it will still be too noisy for him.
Today, her boyfriend purchased a tent for the backyard for him to sleep in, as even though they are sleeping in different rooms, he still feels it’s too loud for him to sleep peacefully.
She’s worried about how over the top this is, and she thinks there are other solutions for him to try like wearing earplugs, or trying out white noise or melatonin.
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“His parents gifted him the house, and neither of us pays rent. He isn’t asking me to leave and is ‘happy’ sleeping in the tent, but I feel so guilty like I’ve pushed him out of his home even though I never wanted him to go outside,” she added.
“I don’t feel morally right staying here with that arrangement, plus is kinda creepy in here alone. It’s an old house, and the two back doors don’t lock, and there are no blinds as he’s not a fan of them.”
“There was someone walking around in the back on the deck where the bedroom is, looking in one night when he was away, and I feel safer with him inside. But more than that, I feel bad knowing I’m in a bed and he’s in a tent.”
She came up with even more suggestions for her boyfriend to try as an alternative to the tent, but he’s not a fan of anything she’s brought up.
She pleaded with him to compromise with her in some way, but he’s insisting he needs to sleep in the tent, and that’s his only hope for a good night’s sleep.
She doesn’t see how she can keep on living in her boyfriend’s house if he’s going to basically live in the backyard now. It feels off to her, but her boyfriend maintains it’s perfectly fine with him.
Oh, and her boyfriend has been hospitalized ten different times for schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, and when he was there, he was upset about how much his roommates snored.
He’s been extremely sensitive to noises since then, and she suspects that having to be hospitalized traumatized her boyfriend.
What advice do you have for her?
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