He Left His Wife For Wanting A Baby, And Her Mom Is Mad He Wasted Her Youth
This 35-year-old man spent eight years with his 34-year-old wife, and they were married for five years. From the start, he told his wife he wasn’t interested in having children.
It’s not that he hates kids; he just felt being a parent wasn’t something he ever wanted, and he did get a taste of it.
“I like my space, my sleep, my hobbies, my sanity. My childhood was chaotic, I raised my younger siblings, blah blah, cue the tiny violin,” he explained.
“The point is: I already did the parent thing, and I am DONE. When we started dating, she claimed she was ‘on the fence’ about kids. She said maybe someday, maybe not, but it wasn’t a big thing for her.”
“I believed her. I told her, clearly, I’d never change my mind. She said she understood. So we moved forward. Got married. Got a dog. Bought a house. Traveled. Built a nice little child-free life.”
After five years of being married, his wife blindsided him by saying she feels like having a baby. Apparently, his wife was considering children for a long time, and her biological clock was ticking.
He understands that people change, but he hasn’t. He pointed out to his wife that he never wanted to have children, and she responded that she figured he would reconsider.
“Excuse me? Come around? To bringing a whole human into the world because you hoped I’d magically transform into Mr. Diaper Daddy? It was like she’d just been banking on me changing my mind the whole time,” he added.
“Like my ‘no’ was a ‘maybe if I wait long enough.’ I felt blindsided. Betrayed, honestly. That’s not compromise — that’s manipulation.”
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“So I said I couldn’t give her what she wants. That I loved her, but it’s not fair to either of us to pretend we’re on the same page anymore. I said we needed to separate. She cried. I cried. She begged me to go to therapy to ‘talk it out.’ I agreed — but therapy didn’t change anything. We’re fundamentally incompatible now.”
He moved out and left his wife, since there was no way to work through the issue of children, and then her family freaked out on him.
His wife’s mom sent him belligerent text messages, admonishing him for wasting his wife’s youth. His wife’s sister hopped on social media and slammed him for running away from his responsibilities and not being a true man.
His wife’s dad emailed him and called him immature and selfish. He threw in there that he obviously never even loved his wife.
His wife’s family is treating him like he’s a monster. He feels terrible for causing his wife so much pain, and he never pictured their marriage going down in flames, but there is no way to compromise such a major life choice.
“But I wasn’t going to lie to her or myself and say ‘maybe’ when the answer is no. And I’m furious that now I’m the villain because I didn’t magically change my entire belief system for her convenience,” he continued.
He’s left wondering if he’s wrong for leaving his wife after all.
What do you think?
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