His Parents Treated Their Adopted Children Better Than Him, And He Can’t Forgive Them
This 25-year-old man is the only child his mom and dad had biologically. When he turned nine, his parents began fostering children, and a few months after this kicked off, they found Emma and Luke.
Emma and Luke are biological siblings, and after his parents took them in, they quit fostering other children so they could give Emma and Luke all of their attention.
“Emma and Luke had trauma and behavioral issues because of their trauma. My parents told me that and said we needed to be understanding,” he explained.
“But that mindset of they need understanding, and my parents not wanting to punish or give consequences, remained throughout my childhood and adolescence.”
“Emma and Luke could break things without consequences, got to stay up late without being asked to try and sleep first, they got first priority at dinner for food, and lots of other similar things. A few weeks after they moved in with us, Emma threw a tantrum because of the toys I had, and she smashed five of them.”
Instead of reprimanding Emma, his mom coddled her and told him that he had to let the issue go. His parents then mentioned they would not be buying him new toys, as they knew Emma would break them.
Emma and Luke broke their own toys too, and his parents didn’t care. There was also an instance where Luke threw DVDs at the wall because he needed some way to entertain himself, and that’s how Luke destroyed his movie collection. His mom and dad acted unbothered yet again.
One time, he accidentally broke his toy in a fall, and cut up his knees, and his parents were angry at him. They snapped that they spent so much money replacing his toys thus far, and they didn’t need him making things messier. Instead of caring that he got hurt, they reprimanded him for something that was outside of his control.
On another occasion, he accidentally broke a glass slipping on a wet floor, and his parents got mad at him for that too, yet Emma and Luke smashed glasses and broke them constantly, and they didn’t get spoken to about it.
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“There were other things, and there’s so much I could get into. But this stuff happened all the time, and I got so sick of it,” he added.
“I tried to communicate my feelings with my parents. I tried to involve other people to help me bring this to my parents’ attention, and it did no good, so I went very low contact. So low that we see each other at most twice a year and never talk over the phone.”
“My parents confronted me at the first (and maybe only) time we saw each other this year, which happened at a family member’s house. They wanted to know why I’m so distant and why I didn’t introduce them to my boyfriend, and why they hear nothing from me.”
His parents didn’t understand why he didn’t speak to Emma or Luke either, so he finally set the record straight. He informed his mom and dad that they had treated him worse than Emma and Luke, and that was the reason he pulled away.
His parents refused to hear him out and said he was holding a grudge, which they didn’t find fair. They did add that they would like to be a part of his life, and they asked him to forgive them.
Well, he said he can’t do that, and his mom and dad got upset about that. Some of his other family members weighed in and said he’s making his parents miserable.
He’s left wondering if he’s a jerk for not being able to forgive his parents and move on.
What do you think?
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