Dear Fellow Control Freaks: Here’s How To Stop Catastrophizing And Take Back Your Life

1. Recognize What Emotion You Are Really Masking

There are countless reasons why some people feel an intrinsic need to control their lives. And most of the time, this desire to constantly be behind the wheel stems from some sort of fear.

To acknowledge your underlying emotions, start by recognizing where you worry about lack of control most.

Do you tense up in anticipation of classes, worrying if you are going to be cold-called? Similarly, at work, do you dread meetings and fret over how your work might be critiqued?

If so, you might suffer from a fear of authority figures. In these cases, try to remember your first negative experience with an authority figure. Ask yourself what the outcome was and how it made you feel.

Similarly, you may struggle with control in romantic relationships. Are you always trying to plan dates or hangouts? Do you immediately get anxious when your partner fails to text you back within a certain time frame?

More often than not, trying to control your love life stems from a fear of abandonment during childhood or young adulthood. Think about your friends, family members, and past partners– did anyone leave you high and dry?

2. Fight Against Irrational Correlations And Beliefs

Once you identify your masked emotion, you can start to unravel the hold it has over your life.

Let’s take the fear of abandonment, for instance. If you had an absent parent or past partner who was never present, recognize that those people made their own choices. It is not up to you to analyze or even understand why they made certain decisions.

Instead, all you should acknowledge is that other people in your life will make their own decisions, too.

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