Forget Happiness And Work To Live A More Meaningful Life: You Will End Up Much More Proud Of Yourself
The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer, Katharina Buczek.
In today’s day and age, we are often taught to pursue happiness above all else.
From television shows and movies to motivational quotes posted on social media, we are told that happiness is the key to a fulfilling life. And that if we can just achieve that elusive state of total contentment, all of our problems will disappear, right?
Quite frankly, though, that could not be further from the truth. Just a week ago, I discussed how the search for constant happiness will always leave us disappointed. Just like life, our emotions are not a constant, upward trend that will never encounter any obstacles or challenges.
Instead, our emotional state more so resembles waves in the ocean– fluctuating up and down depending on the time of year, our triumphs, our challenges, and our life changes.
So, if happiness is not the realistic end-all-be-all goal we should be striving for, then what is? Well, I believe that feeling is fulfillment– which is gained when you work to live a more meaningful life.
I get it: this sounds a lot easier said than done, especially if you are currently stuck in some life circumstances that are unchangeable right now.
But no matter who you are, where you live, or what profession you work in, there are a few concrete steps that everybody can take to start living their life with more purpose and intention.
Start Living For Meaning
michaeljung – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
In order to lead a more meaningful life, you have to first get to the bottom of what is meaningful to you. Stop looking to other people in your social circle or online for the answers, and quit feeling as though you have to follow in their footsteps to achieve “happiness.”
Instead, get honest with yourself and ask the hard questions. What is most important to you in life? What do you stand for? What do you value?
Once you have a clearer understanding of your own motivations and drivers, you can start to make decisions that align with your values– whether that be showing up to help out at the soup kitchen on Sundays and giving back to those in need or booking a one-way ticket to Europe and living out your nomadic aspirations.
In addition to being self-aware and listening to your own intrinsic wants and needs, leading a more meaningful life is also easier when you prioritize relationships.
As humans, we revel in connection and thrive in groups. The quality of our relationships can also significantly impact our overall mental health.
So, be sure to let go of any toxic relationships or acquaintances who no longer serve your best interest.
Instead, focus on nourishing meaningful connections with loved ones, friends, and strangers. By deepening your social roots in your community, you will not only be helping yourself– but you will also become a trusted supporter and friend. And what’s more meaningful than that?
Finally, in the insatiable search for happiness, too many people refuse to step outside of their comfort zones. We have all fallen victim to this before, too– thinking we have all the answers and know exactly what would bring us joy.
The truth is, though, that we will never gain more meaning or fulfillment from cornering ourselves into this tiny box. We have to break down the walls, try out new things, and say to hell with our fears.
Trust me: I know firsthand how terrifying it can be to take risks and conquer your fears. For some reason, I thought it would be an awesome idea to go skydiving with some friends a few years ago despite my crippling fear of heights.
I’m not going to pretend the whole experience was sunshine and rainbows, either. Once we ascended 10,000 feet into the sky and my instructor opened the door, my heart was in my stomach. All I could see were clouds and the faint curve of the Earth.
But what were my options at that moment? I could have either chickened out, descended with the plane, lost a couple of hundred bucks, and missed out on a once-in-a-lifetime experience with friends. Or, I could use my heart to overpower the anxious thoughts in my mind and just go for the jump.
I am so glad I went with the latter.
Now, I am not saying that you necessarily have to jump out of a plane to feel fulfilled in your life. But I am telling you that when I faced my own personal fear in the grandest way possible, I felt utterly on top of the world.
The wind on my face was chilly and whipping. My heart was racing, and my body was plummeting. But it was the most incredible feeling I have ever felt.
And honestly, I don’t think it was because of the skydiving experience at all. Instead, I really believe I just felt proud of myself for exercising courage and taking the leap even when my mind told me not to.
As humans, we all want to be proud of ourselves. So when we continue to back down from challenges, we may resort to feelings of unworthiness, incapability, and apathy.
Work to actively fight against these inclinations and overpower them whenever you can. If you have a fear of public speaking, go to a local karaoke night and get on stage. If you never travel because you have a fear of planes, book a trip to your dream destination and don’t look back.
By pushing ourselves, we can learn, grow, and experience life in ways that we never thought possible. And in the end, you will be left feeling accomplished, fulfilled, purposeful, and proud.
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