Before You Decide To Make Things More Serious, Here Are Some Major Signs That Your New Guy Or Gal Might Be Emotionally Unavailable
In the dating world, when you’re going out with a total stranger, you can never know for sure what their past dating or relationship experience was like.
For instance, there are a lot of people on dating apps who just went through a serious or difficult breakup and aren’t ready for anything serious. Unfortunately, they don’t always come forward and tell you that, so you spend a lot of your dates guessing if this person is emotionally available or ready for a relationship that’s anything more than casual.
Then, if they really are emotionally unavailable and you’re ready for something more committed, there’s a good chance they’ll break things off with you out of the blue.
So, if you’ve started going on some dates with someone and you’re sensing something is off about them, here are some indicators that they’re emotionally unavailable and not ready to dive into anything serious.
You’ll want to pay close attention to this person’s actions and motives while dating them. There are a lot of things that can be misconstrued as emotional availability. For instance, if they suddenly seem really vulnerable when talking about their ex, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they are invested in you and trust you. It could mean that they’re still hung up and emotionally invested in their ex.
If they’re texting you all the time and are quick to respond to you, it can mean they have more available time versus emotional availability.
You really want to look out for signs of respect in your relationship with this person. A person who is emotionally available and invested will respect your time and feelings. You want someone who will show up on time to dates, show initiation in planning dates, commit to future dates, and have meaningful conversations with you.
An emotionally available person will want to know more and more about you. They’ll ask you questions about your life and your personality and will remember what you’ve been up to. An emotionally unavailable person will do the opposite. They’ll only talk about themselves and their problems, hardly ever ask you questions, and will be quick to change the subject whenever you become vulnerable.
If, after reading this, you’ve realized the person you’ve been seeing may be emotionally unavailable, it’s up to you what you want to do next. Sure, you can confront them and ask if they agree with you, but chances are, because of shame or other reasons, they won’t be honest with you.
SHOTPRIME STUDIO – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
If it seems like a situation where you’d want to keep them around, but they may need time to become emotionally available, you can calmly tell them how you can tell they’re not ready for anything serious but that you’d be willing to try going out with them again after they take a few months to work on their issues.
Finally, if you can see yourself moving past this emotionally unavailable person or are ready to move on and find someone else, go for it. Don’t feel like you have to wait around for someone to change, especially if this is someone you have no history with.
You deserve the kind of relationship you want and don’t need to waste your time waiting for people who want the opposite. Hang in there, and good luck!
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