She’s Upset That The Wonderful Guy She’s Dating Is Living In A House That’s A Total Mess
Two months ago, this 30-year-old woman started dating a 32-year-old guy, and she has been feeling great about the connection they’re making.
He’s caring, supportive, intelligent, and generous. But a week ago, she was invited over to his home, and it was not how she envisioned it at all.
“How he dresses, smells, and behaves is very nice and decent,” she explained. “But his place…OMG. He is so messy, very, very much, and very dirty and filthy.”
“Garbage, empty bottles, dirty dishes, clothes, empty packs, dirty sheets, this and that everywhere. There is even no decent place to sit or even sleep…I am not a hygiene freak, and I am a people pleaser. Plus, I like him. so I tolerated it and spent the night with him.”
The entire time she was at his place, she felt uncomfortable and, frankly, upset that he didn’t think to pick up for her.
He was an excellent host by all means, trying to make her feel at ease and offering her drinks and food, but that didn’t fix how much of a disaster zone everything around her was.
There was garbage everywhere, such as chocolate wrappers, bottles, and empty bags of chips. Dirty dishes and water bottles were overflowing in his kitchen.
It wasn’t so much the mess that shocked her; it’s what the mess actually represents, and that has her feeling super concerned for him.
She would never think to ask someone to come over to her place if her home was in that kind of an unlivable condition.
pressmaster – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
She did think that this guy felt embarrassed about the squalor, as he stated his friend told him he should pick the place up in anticipation of her coming to stay over.
She brushed it off and acted sympathetic, but on the inside, she was overwhelmingly disappointed and sad about it.
She does know he has ADHD and depression, and seeing his home made her suspect his mental health struggles are far deeper and worse than she suspected.
He has always shown her a high-functioning side, but his living conditions say otherwise. She can’t help but feel as if he led her on in some way because of all this.
If she knew he was living like this two months ago, she would have been more guarded and would have taken a totally different approach.
So far, she has considered his personal hygiene to be good, but now she’s doubting that’s something she can expect to see maintained moving forward.
She really does like this guy a lot, and she’s feeling absolutely awful about everything.
“I am attracted to him and feel good around him, but his mess (because his mess shows he is not functioning very well) made me feel upset,” she said.
“I don’t know how he works and keeps his life together while living like that. Am I too judgemental? What should I do?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Romance