He Still Can’t Forgive His Brother For Having An Affair With His Girlfriend Three Years Ago, But His Parents Just Want Him To Get Over It
Three years ago, this 26-year-old man was dating C, 25, his high school sweetheart. He was devoted to her and thought she cared just as much about him. They were deeply in love and lived together. Right before Thanksgiving, he’d been helping a friend move and staying at their place for a few days. Afterward, he went to the grocery store to buy some desserts for Thanksgiving dinner.
Once he arrived home, C and her belongings were gone. When he called her, he was sent right to her voicemail. During their relationship, she usually had her location turned on, so he tried to see where she was, but her location was off.
“I checked my front door cam, and I saw my brother helping her move her things into his car and leaving with her. I then tried to call my brother, but he wouldn’t answer, either. At this point, I started to freak out and assume the worst,” he said.
At the same time, he couldn’t imagine that his brother, 23, would do something to purposely hurt him. Throughout their childhood, he and his brother had a close bond. They grew apart when he moved away to attend college, but they still got together occasionally. He always considered his brother one of his best friends in the world.
After his brother and C refused to answer his calls, he called his father and asked him to ask his mother to call his brother and put the phone on speaker when she got a hold of him. Once his mother had the phone on speaker, she asked his brother what had happened to C.
“He said, ‘She’s living with me now. She broke up with him.’ I felt numb at those words. I thought this was some kind of sick joke, so I checked his Facebook and Instagram and saw them holding each other and kissing, and I broke down. ‘Why was C doing this to me?’ was going through my head all night,” he explained.
Eventually, the shock wore off, and he was furious. He was astounded that his brother, someone he was so close to, was capable of such betrayal. Motivated by rage, he drove to his brother’s house and began pounding at the front door, screaming for his brother to let him in. However, C was the one who answered the door instead.
The moment he saw her, he burst into tears and couldn’t stop sobbing. A few moments later, his brother, who’d apparently been in the kitchen, walked over to the door and told C to go upstairs so they could talk.
That’s when he told me that they had been having an affair ever since my second year of college, and he apologized to me for it. Then, C came back downstairs and said that the reason she left me the way she did was because she was sick of pretending to love me,” he shared.
alenazamotaeva – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
After C said this, he stared at her and realized that he didn’t even recognize her. She was not the woman he’d been in love with for so many years. It was as if she was a completely different person. Eventually, he accepted that it was a waste of time and energy to continue arguing with C and his brother, so he finally left.
Normally, he doesn’t cause drama and avoids toxic situations; in his opinion, if nothing can be changed by confronting someone or arguing with them, he’d rather just let things go. Before he left his brother’s house, he made it clear that he would be cutting communication with them then and there.
Now, he lives in California and isn’t in a relationship. Not long ago, his family got together to celebrate his father’s 49th birthday. Eventually, his brother and C, who are now married and have a baby, arrived at the party, their baby in a stroller.
Over the years, he’s been in therapy to work through the emotional struggles he endured after learning that his brother and C had been having an affair, and he feels like he’s moved on from the situation. In therapy, he accepted that there was nothing wrong with him and that the problem was with C and her poor decisions.
During the party, his brother attempted to talk to him, but he gave him the cold shoulder, continuing to converse with one of their aunts. A couple of hours later, he wasn’t even aware that C and his brother were still there because he wasn’t paying them any attention.
Later, he was walking to the basement to grab some ice cream. His brother walked downstairs after him, accidentally scaring him in the process. Visibly uncomfortable, his brother told him he was sorry for hooking up with C behind his back, but he completely ignored him and went back upstairs.
His brother didn’t try to talk to him again for the rest of the party, but the following day, his mother texted him and asked that he forgive him. In his view, his parents’ religious views were partly the reason why they’d already forgiven his brother for what he’d done. But he doesn’t want to forgive his brother because his actions have made it difficult for him to trust anyone.
Even though his brother was fully aware of how much he loved C, that didn’t stop him from hooking up with her and later marrying her. It seemed like his brother assumed he should just move on with his life, but he’s doubtful that he’ll ever be able to forgive him.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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