This 27-year-old man and his girlfriend, also 27, have been dating for 11 years since they were only 16. They didn’t talk about getting married for the first few years of their relationship.
His girlfriend’s parents were married in their early 20s, while his parents were married in their early 30s. So, he and his girlfriend had different perspectives about what age seemed most reasonable for marriage.
Throughout their relationship, he always thought they would get married in their late 20s after they’d graduated from college and purchased a home. However, his girlfriend thought it would be better to get married closer to when her parents did, in her mid-20s.
“When we were 23, her dad was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, which devastated my girlfriend’s family,” he said.
The night that his girlfriend heard the news, she went over to his house and cried for several hours. She shared how devastated she was that her father wouldn’t be able to walk her down the aisle on her wedding day.
He comforted his girlfriend and told her that her father would be able to attend their wedding and that everything would work out fine.
“For two years, it was okay until it wasn’t. When we were 25, I planned to propose to her at the end of 2023 (when I finished my Master’s). However, in July, her dad died unexpectedly from pneumonia,” he explained.
Understandably, his girlfriend was heartbroken by the loss of her father. She was her parents’ only daughter; she was the youngest and had three brothers. Several months after her father’s funeral, she brought up marriage and told him that she didn’t want to get married now.
In her view, it would be pointless since her father wouldn’t be at the wedding. He told her they could do something special to honor her father, but she rejected the idea.
“So, every couple of months until now, I’ve asked her wedding-related questions like, ‘How many bridesmaids would you have?’ but she doesn’t seem interested. I sat her down last night and talked about our timeline for our future and whether marriage was going to be something in the cards for us. She replied, ‘We had our chance to get married, and it’s too late,'” he shared.
He acknowledged that his girlfriend is mourning her father’s passing and is depressed, and he believes that she hates him for not marrying her before her father died.
During their conversations, his girlfriend told him she still wanted to continue their relationship but didn’t want to marry him anymore.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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