He Put His Wedding On Hold After Finding Out That His Fiancée Cheated On Him Six Years Ago
Just over six years ago, this 30-year-old guy graduated from college and started a job in a new city. His 28-year-old fiancée was only his girlfriend back then, and she was still in college.
His fiancée was always kind and loving, and she said she was so impressed, as well as obsessed, with him.
About a year before he graduated, he learned his fiancée had an older guy friend who ended up being in love with her.
She told this guy that she was in a committed relationship and created some space between them after he confessed his true feelings for her.
Anyway, after he graduated and started his first job, it was hard on him and his fiancée. His fiancée was upset with him for not helping her with her college work, and she was also disappointed that they couldn’t spend as much time together.
Several weeks into his job, his fiancée mentioned she was going to ask that questionable older guy friend to help her out with her college workload. He begged her not to do it, and then she became really cold and distant with him.
Four months after that, he got a strange message from a random anonymous account saying something like you might believe you’re a smart guy, but there is always someone more intelligent than you.
He guessed this had to be his fiancée’s older guy friend, and he showed her the message. She admitted after a few days that she had asked this friend to help her with her work, but then he began saying he was in love with her, so she created some space between them.
She pointed out that her friend had to be furious with her for the whole situation, which would explain the cryptic message.
Yaroslav Astakhov – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“She was so disgusted with him and so ashamed for even thinking about talking to him,” he said.
“And she told me she always thought he was a cringe and a creep, especially now that he dared to go text her boyfriend, me. A few months later, she came to me very emotional and told me that she lied about that period. It wasn’t just talking on the phone; they actually hung out together in the car and went to restaurants.”
“She told me she couldn’t tell me the full truth because she was disgusted with herself and because didn’t want to hurt me and didn’t know what to do. And that now she knows she was wrong for keeping it a secret and that her way of seeing things changed. We moved on.”
A couple of years ago, he proposed, and from that time until now, he would frequently question his fiancée about whether anything more had ever gone down with her friend, but she maintained that was not the case.
Since his fiancée was nothing but kind, loving, and wonderful, he decided to let things go. But then, last month, he couldn’t stop thinking that something more had gone on, and his fiancée finally caved.
She sobbed for hours and admitted that she had a physical affair with this guy. She claimed she only engaged with him for the attention and knew it was wrong of her.
“Of course, she kept explaining herself that she admittedly thought she was doing the right thing by not telling the whole truth so she doesn’t hurt me and that because she thought it was too bad to put into words to me because I was so good to her and she couldn’t break me,” he added.
“And that she adores and worships me too much that she was scared I’d leave her if she told me. Especially that it was over after 4 months, and she changed and became a better person after that.”
“I was obviously shocked, hurt, and disappointed at her and at myself for being delusional and investing my time, emotions, and money for years in someone who did this to me during my most difficult times. She’s always showed me that she was madly in love with me and that she’s desperate for me to marry her since the first day we’ve been together. So I’m shocked to know what she’s capable of doing to me. I feel like I don’t really know her.”
He informed his fiancée that he’s putting their wedding on hold. But honestly, he’s more inclined to dump her.
Their entire relationship has been based on trust, and he can’t ever trust her again. He’s also so upset that his fiancée was fine with marrying him and not telling him the truth about her cheating ways.
He does love her and hopes it can work out, but he’s being a realist and not holding his breath here.
His fiancée has insisted she’s humiliated, and back then was a bad time for her. She requested that he give her another chance to win him back and prove that she’s trustworthy since she can’t picture being with anyone but him.
He did say he’s open to her winning him over and proving he can trust her again, but he’s up in the air right now about how to move forward.
He’s been feeling so emotional and needy since her confession, and he has never before acted this way.
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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