It’s a common misconception that you have to do something truly unforgivable to be scrubbed from a parent’s will. In reality, sometimes all it takes is refusing to sign up for a lifetime of babysitting a grown man who just won’t grow up.
This woman was under the impression that in order to have a parent cut you out of their will completely, you have to do something truly horrific or barbaric. But she’s living proof that’s not always true.
Eight years ago, she hosted her dad for a holiday dinner at her house. Her dad was a dreadful human being, so she rarely communicated with him.
However, she fulfilled her daughterly duties and had him over to spend the holidays with her family. While they were hanging out in her living room, her dad mentioned his plan for his house after he passed away.
Her dad went on to say that he was going to leave his home to her and her brother, but he wanted her brother to be able to live in it while she paid for the taxes, since her brother never has any money and is a deadbeat.
Her dad thought it made sense, as she got part of the asset and wouldn’t have to worry about cleaning the house out. Now, her brother has been living in her dad’s basement for years on end, and it’s not like he’s disabled or anything like that.
Her brother has had a steady job and earns the same income that she does, but he’s always completely broke and penniless. She’s not sure why this is or what he blows all of his money on.
“My father has repeatedly and consistently given him extra money. And my brother has gone into my father’s bank account and wiped it out. Taken his social security,” she explained.
“There were times when I ended up buying food for my parents because they didn’t have money for food because [my brother] stole their money. He also used to steal my money when we were kids, so this isn’t new behavior for him.”
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“He also stole my grandfather’s collection of silver dimes. He never got in trouble for any of this. I don’t know where the money goes or what his problem is.”
She shut her dad down and said she was not on board with his scheme. Her dad demanded to know what her brother would do if she refused to financially support him. She informed her dad that her brother clearly had to figure things out.
Not long after that holiday chat about the house, her dad cut her out of his will and gave her brother his house, because she didn’t want to be on the hook for supporting her brother.
She and her brother are past middle age, and their dad recently passed away. He was in his mid-90s. Her dad did leave a little money to his grandkids, which means her brother is currently furious that he didn’t inherit absolutely everything.
“It’s not a lot of money. My daughter is planning to use her share to help pay for a used car. I’m fortunate that I don’t need his money, but it still stings to realize how little I meant to him,” she continued.
“His love was always conditional, and this is just another example of that. Sadly, there are more. And the last person I want any financial entanglements with is my loser brother. My children and I have made bets as to when the house and money will be gone, and [my brother] will have nobody to bail him out.”
Well, she said it herself; her dad wasn’t a good person, so I’m not sure what she expected. I think this is a blessing in disguise, and now she can quit speaking to her brother for the rest of her life because he’s not worth keeping in it.
And when he can’t come up with the money to pay the taxes on the house, I bet she can buy it out of foreclosure if she feels like owning it.
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
