If your sibling started dating your ex and then decided to marry them, how would you feel? Would you want to even attend the wedding?
This 25-year-old woman spent eight years dating her ex-boyfriend, who is the same age as her, and they split up three years ago. Their last year spent together was truly a nightmare.
Her ex constantly had his friends over, and they trashed their apartment. Her ex and his friends were also so obnoxious and loud that the neighbors complained.
“He would call me controlling and annoying when I asked him to be more considerate. He would call me names, like…fat…and a psycho,” she explained.
“I’m pretty sure he cheated on me with the girlfriend of one of his friends, too. It was never confirmed, but I believe it likely happened.”
“When we broke up, he told me I was the biggest mistake of his life, and he felt repulsed by me and couldn’t believe I didn’t know my place.”
Her 26-year-old sister came to live with her after the breakup. Her sister and her parents were extremely supportive of her. They encouraged her to go to therapy, and they said if she ever ended up with a man that toxic again, she would have to leave him.
She loved living with her sister, as they have always had a wonderful bond. They spent a ton of time together, and her sister acted like her cheerleader.
Her sister was also there for her when she finally felt independent enough to live on her own. Because of how close she’s been with her sister, you can see why she felt blindsided six months ago after her sister revealed she had gone on a date with her ex.
“I felt so incredibly betrayed. My parents were shocked and gave my sister [a hard time] for a month, but then my sister told us they were a couple for real and they were serious about each other,” she added.
“She said he had grown up, and he had accepted his faults and was working on bettering himself, and that they clicked. I asked her if anything happened when I was still with him, and she said no.”
“She said nothing happened until seven months ago when they saw each other for the first time in over a year. She told me she didn’t understand why I couldn’t try to accept it. Our parents did after talking it out with her.”
A month ago, her sister declared that she and her ex are getting married. They’re not going to have a crazy big wedding, but they have invited all of their loved ones to be in attendance.
She informed her sister that she will not be going to the wedding. Now her parents are mad at her for refusing to go and for failing to be happy that her sister found the love of her life.
Her sister thinks that she should be in her corner, considering everything her sister has done in her life to be supportive of her, but she can’t bring herself to fake it.
“I told her her marrying the person who wore me down and shattered my self-esteem and self-worth was the reason I couldn’t be happy for her,” she continued.
“I feel pretty darn abandoned right now, and I’m not sure what I do about my relationship with my parents or my sister. I can’t even look her in the eye anymore.”
Her sister is rushing to the altar, which doesn’t make sense unless her sister and her ex were secretly dating for longer than they claim to have been an item.
It’s possible her ex also cheated on her with her sister, which is an even worse possibility to consider. Regardless of what went down, her sister is pretty awful for getting with her sloppy seconds.
Her parents are also horrible for changing their minds and having the audacity to be angry at her for not wanting to go to the wedding.
It sounds like she should reevaluate having her parents and sister in her life after this. I would be cutting contact with all of them if I were in her shoes.
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
