If your partner did something that ended up hurting you, but they twisted it around and somehow made themselves the victim, would you view that as a red flag?
This 30-year-old man has a 32-year-old girlfriend, and they live with one another. A couple of days ago, his girlfriend was cooking dinner and put a ceramic plate on one of their electric stove’s burners.
His girlfriend turned that burner on instead of another one and turned it up to maximum. Several minutes later, the plate shattered, and pieces of hot ceramic flew all over their kitchen.
“She has a habit of breaking dishes, cups, glasses, keepsakes, breakables, etc., so the first thing she yelled was ‘I didn’t drop it!’ or something along those lines,” he explained.
He was sitting close by and leaped out of his seat while exclaiming it was the burner of the stove. He raced across the kitchen to shut it off and asked his girlfriend if she had put the plate on top of it, but she didn’t respond.
He helped his girlfriend pick up the plate pieces and accidentally grabbed hold of a super-hot one, which burned his thumb. He cursed as he dropped the piece on the floor.
“After we were done, I asked her to please be more careful in the future and watch where she puts stuff. I said, ‘Please don’t put things on top of burners or the stove that can melt or break, like plastic or ceramics. We’re lucky nothing worse happened,'” he continued.
“The next morning, she blew up at me, crying and saying she doesn’t deserve to be treated like [garbage] over a plate, and now will barely speak to me.”
“While I was definitely a little shocked, I never insulted her or yelled at her. We have cats, and they could’ve easily been struck by a burning piece of plate as they often stand under us while cooking.
His girlfriend pretty much always makes him feel like he’s walking on eggshells, and he has told her this before. She also will never apologize to him unless she can visibly see how hurt he is about something. He’s left wondering if he was somehow wrong for reminding his girlfriend to be more careful.
First of all, his girlfriend is old enough to know better than to put anything on the stove that shouldn’t be there, like a ceramic plate.
His girlfriend’s carelessness is scary, and her inability to accept responsibility for her dangerous actions is worrisome. It’s not acceptable that she tried to make herself the victim when he was the one who got hurt.
And speaking of getting hurt, she’s putting their pets in danger, too. I think he needs to ask himself if this is really someone he wants to be with.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
