Some people believe that guys and girls simply cannot be platonic friends, while others find that notion ridiculous. But regardless of which camp you fall into, how would you feel if the man you were dating continued to get close to other women, even though you had told him it made you uncomfortable?
That’s the unfortunate situation this 31-year-old woman found herself in with her boyfriend, who’s 43. They dated for around a year and a half, and at first, things were going wonderfully.
“He had pursued me for a year before I finally agreed to date him,” she recalled.
However, it was after they became official that she noticed something strange. She realized that one of his female friends would give her boyfriend a call every single day during her commute. On top of that, they were always texting each other and, from time to time, they went on late-night walks alone.
She didn’t hesitate to tell her boyfriend that their relationship made her uncomfortable. And for the record, she’s not completely opposed to him being friends with females.
“I’m fine with him texting them, having lunch or dinner with them one-on-one, and staying in touch with long-term friends,” she explained.
“But this particular girl, whom he’d only known for a year or two, felt different.”
After she spoke to her boyfriend, though, he seemed to understand where she was coming from. He actually stopped talking to that friend daily or going on late-night walks with her. Instead, the pair just met up for lunch on occasion, which she actually encouraged them to do.
Yet, once that one female friend was out of the picture, another started to encroach on her relationship. This time, her boyfriend began getting closer to a different girl in his friend group.
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The two were suddenly texting each other each day, and again, her boyfriend would hang out with the girl alone late at night. And instead of walks, the girl actually started hanging out at his place.
“The girl’s younger, single, and emotionally needy, which raised red flags for me,” she detailed.
“I told him I was uncomfortable, and he promised it wouldn’t happen again.”
Despite that, her boyfriend broke his promise. Apparently, he’d initially met the girl during dance classes, and one day, he invited her over to teach him some dance moves.
That sent her over the edge, and she admittedly “freaked out.” Meanwhile, her boyfriend keeps claiming that he loves her.
“But honestly, his actions don’t feel like love to me. I don’t believe him anymore,” she vented.
This led her to officially break up with her boyfriend. And now, she can’t help but wonder whether calling it quits and refusing to buy that he still loves her is understandable or makes her a jerk.
Do you think it’s strange that her boyfriend keeps getting close to other women? Is it possible he’s not interested in them? Even so, is it still an issue since she clearly stated it made her uncomfortable?
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By Katharina Buczek
Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing in... More about Katharina Buczek
