Chip Chick
Because of this mindset, people end up returning to a toxic ex – they want to change their past experiences by “doing things differently.” Unfortunately, this is rarely how it works out and will likely only add another brick to your trauma wall.
Reason #6: You have insecurities you have not dealt with.
Insecurities can develop from all sorts of past experiences and lead to low self-esteem. In addition, these insecurities can have you making choices you are not proud of. One such choice is backsliding to your toxic ex.
Your toxic ex knows you well and knows how to play to your insecurities in a way that will break your will and make you think going back is a good idea. If you have insecurities you haven’t dealt with, you are more likely to be swayed back into a relationship with your toxic ex.
Reason #7: You convince yourself, “it’ll be different this time.”
You put your heart and soul into that last relationship. When it went up in flames, you lost everything. It broke you – it hurt you.
Now that toxic ex wants you back, you want to give them another chance. Why? Because after all the time and energy you put into it, you want something to show for it besides heartache. So you reminisce on the good parts of the relationship and decide you’ll take steps to make things different this time.
I wouldn’t get your hopes up that it would be different this time if I were you.
How Do You Stop Yourself From Going Back?
While there is no perfect playbook for stopping yourself from going back to a toxic ex, there are a few steps I have given clients who struggled with this. These steps have worked for hundreds of clients I have worked with to develop resilience to resist falling into toxic patterns.
Use these steps to stop yourself from going back to your toxic ex:
