He Resents His Stay-At-Home Wife Because She Essentially Quit Her Job, Stopped Driving, And Wants Him To Take Over All Of The Household And Childcare Responsibilities While He Still Works Full-Time
For the past 14 years, this 39-year-old man’s wife, who is 38, was a stay-at-home mom. Then, in 2022, she went back to work.
By the time the beginning of this year rolled around, though, his wife reportedly decided to cut down her hours. And at first, he said that was fine and told her to do what she needed to do.
Well, that was until he realized that his wife had actually reduced her hours to zero.
“Last I checked, zero hours means you quit your job. But what do I know? She tells me she has a job,” he said.
On top of that, his wife apparently decided to diagnose herself with “de pession.” And even though she means “depression,” she actually refuses to pronounce the term correctly.
Finally, his wife also decided to stop driving entirely due to her anxiety.
As you can imagine, he felt completely blindsided after all of this happened at once. After all, he and his wife had participated in couples counseling for a few years prior to COVID-19, and everything had been going well.
Once he suggested they go back to therapy more recently, though, his wife was adamant that it did not work. She also just told him that he needed therapy since he was a jerk.
Amidst all of this, his wife then decided to point out how he did not do anything at home. So, she claimed that he needed to “step up” his household responsibilities.
gzorgz – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
While he did work from home during the COVID-19 pandemic, though, he is now back at his office and is working out of the house for 10 to 12 hours every day.
“So I find it hard to do laundry or take the kids to school from my desk. I also do not have the privilege of getting the kids on the bus at 8:00 a.m. and being home to get them off the bus at 3:00 p.m.,” he explained.
Regardless of that fact, his wife wants him home to take care of their children in both the mornings and the afternoons.
She has also continued refusing to get help for her depression in spite of him constantly trying to talk to her about it.
In fact, his wife apparently just changes the subject before talking about how much harder her job is than his.
She also claims that “men don’t do enough for her around the house,” even though he swears that he has been doing everything lately.
For instance, since his wife refuses to leave the house now, he goes to Walmart twice a week to do all of the grocery shopping.
He also has to drive their kids to all of the programs she signed them up for and cooks dinner four nights per week.
So, quite frankly, he feels taken advantage of.
“By someone who doesn’t understand that doing laundry twice a week is not a $30,000 a year job,” he added.
“Yes, she puts the kids on the bus. But now that she reduced her hours to zero, I get told she has a job and takes care of the house and kids on her own.”
And honestly, he has no idea what to do. He is wondering if he can force his wife to get a different job because her refusing to drive due to anxiety is driving him insane.
He also admitted that he is ready to reduce his own hours down to zero since his workday keeps getting in the way of all the household responsibilities he needs to tend to. Obviously, though, that is just not realistic.
“Unfortunately, my kids like food, and my wife loves the internet. So, if I quit, the merry-go-round stops,” he vented.
This means that he has been left feeling completely torn about how else to deal with this situation at home.
Is it understandable why he is so frustrated? Why do you think his wife refuses to get help? What options does he have in this situation? What would you do?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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