This Doctor Is Discussing The Biggest Mistakes People Make When Trying To Make Changes In Their Lives That Are Positive
Are you feeling down about life lately? Maybe you feel like everyone else is speeding past you while you’re stuck in a rut. You’ve tried being more positive, but it only seems to backfire.
If this sounds like you, then you might be making one significant error in how you perceive life.
Dr. Julie Smith (@drjuliesmith) is a psychologist, and she’s sharing some transformative insight on TikTok for people who are trying to incorporate more positivity into their lives.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is to set yourself up with too-high expectations. Sometimes, those who are on the path to healing naively believe that every day should be better than the last.
They think they should constantly be making strides until they reach a high point where everything is all sunshine and rainbows. As a visual, Dr. Smith draws a graph to illustrate what that expectation looks like. The line on the graph is advancing diagonally in a fixed line like a steep incline.
The problem with that mindset is that it’s not how humans learn and progress. It’s rigid and does not allow room for flexibility. Unreasonable optimistic thinking can trigger a self-defeating spiral and make you wonder why things don’t seem to be improving at a steady pace.
Unfortunately, life does not follow a straight line. The key is to accept that there will be both good days and bad days. It’s impossible to have the positive without the negative.
Dr. Smith then draws another line on the graph to demonstrate what the course of life is really like. This time, the line is a lot bumpier and contains several dips and peaks.
In life, you will experience improvements and setbacks. And often, when people experience a setback, they take it as a sign that they’re going backward and not making any progress when that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Vasyl – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Facing obstacles is a part of life that is inevitable. Eventually, you will encounter a hitch at various points in your life, but that does not mean you aren’t growing as a person or that everything you’ve worked toward is falling apart.
That way of thinking will lead you to become frustrated with how your life is turning out and cause you to give up.
So instead, embrace the setback and view it as a learning experience that is only helping you develop into the person you want to become. Then, whether it’s a good or bad day, know you’re headed in the right direction.
Several TikTok users voiced their appreciation for Dr. Smith’s advice, and for some, it couldn’t have come at a better time.
“This kind of teaching is essential for people who grew up with toxic parents who wouldn’t let them make mistakes,” commented one user.
“…I needed to hear that so badly! I think I might even draw this graph and put it on my wall!” exclaimed another.
“We have to have ups and downs, or life would be a flatline,” pointed out a third.
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