He Told His Girlfriend He Feels Disrespected By Her Constant Mess, But She Just Accused Him Of Being Shallow
Two weeks ago, this 50-year-old man was frustrated that his girlfriend, 47, had a ton of garbage piling up in their garage.
The two of them have been having an ongoing fight over this issue because every three to four months, his girlfriend gets incredibly behind in cleaning and doesn’t throw things away or keep their house neat.
In the garage, he saw numerous empty boxes of wine, soda, and other miscellaneous items. This was the last straw for him.
Over and over again, he requested that she and her children, 16 and 20, make sure to recycle these empty boxes, but none of them listened.
Unfortunately, his girlfriend piles stuff on top of any surface that she can. Their coffee table, kitchen table, and countertops are covered with stuff, and their bedroom is so cluttered that there is only a tiny path through which she can walk to get to her side of their bed.
During the most recent argument, he questioned his girlfriend about why she didn’t seem to have any respect for him.
She told him that she did respect him, but he argued that her actions didn’t match her words.
“I pointed to the boxes and asked how many times I have to ask her to clean up after herself. Currently, throughout the house and garage, there’s a mix of trash, crusty food dishes, dirty clothes, makeup/fake nail stuff, liquor bottles, soda cans, wadded-up paper towels, opened Amazon packages, and yes, every flat surface that’s not my own dresser,” he said.
His girlfriend was angry and called him “shallow” because she felt like the only thing that mattered to him was the way the house looked.
Prostock-studio – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Then, she said that if he was so concerned about the mess, he could feel free to be the one to clean everything up. From there, the fight escalated.
His girlfriend claimed that the state of the house was never an issue until he started an argument about it. He admitted that as the conversation progressed, he started bringing up other things about her that bothered him.
“I steered the conversation to a wider range of issues, like her lack of putting effort into us (she’s always on TikTok; when I picked her up from work today, she had her earbuds in and was watching TikTok), her lack of contributing to the household (not cleaning up after herself, not helping get her kids to clean up after themselves), and little financial contribution,” he explained.
Despite his girlfriend constantly telling him that the reason she works every day is so that she can make money to chip in, she doesn’t contribute much to their monthly bills.
He also is not happy because they don’t have much intimacy within their relationship, and he doesn’t feel like his girlfriend is emotionally supportive, either.
“I told her that I needed to feel respected, and I needed her to be more involved and pick up her messes,” he shared.
In response, his girlfriend told him not to express that he “‘needs'” something from her. She told him he was materialistic and claimed that he was only upset about the house being messy because he had some childhood trauma that she thought he should work through.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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