She’s Been In A Situationship With A Guy For The Last Two Years, But He Confessed To Sleeping With Another Girl He Met On A Dating App
For the last two years, this 27-year-old woman has been in a situationship with a 28-year-old guy. Initially, she was the one who requested that they only do something casual.
She knew she wasn’t ready for a committed relationship back when she met him since she had just exited one.
“He initiated pursuing me in the beginning – getting me flowers, introducing me to family, even building a haunted house in his apartment for me [for] our first Halloween together, then eventually telling me he loved me first, which is when I started to fall in love as well and felt like I had met someone so amazing that I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to pursue things further,” she explained.
Around four months in, she felt ready to commit to him, but they never had a discussion about exclusivity.
She gave him more space, and he went on to date other girls off and on, and she kept herself on different dating apps, but wasn’t interested in other guys.
A year into dating him, he said he was talking to another girl, but he ended things as he realized he was in love with her.
“At this point, I had been through so much hurt from him continuing to want to pursue other options, lying to me on nights where he was on dates, and eventually telling me that he had been sleeping with other women during this time when I was under the impression that we were at least exclusively sleeping together,” she added.
“I decided to just try to let go of the past since he reassured me that this would be it for us and we would finally be together, but he ended up getting back on apps and dating other women about 3 months later (around March 2024).”
“Now, the reason he says that he’s been so unsure about committing to me is because I’ve been so emotional and unsteady for [the] majority of the relationship because of what we have been through.”
Sofiia – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
He maintains that he wants to just be happy and peaceful with her, but she’s stated to him that he’s the reason she’s been so unstable so far.
He’s the one who’s hot then cold about how he feels for her, along with doubting a serious relationship.
She understands that she has been really emotional lately, as well as very attached to him, so she can understand things from his perspective.
She’s kept on giving this situationship her all, but he’s been pulling back more and more. Aside from his failure to commit, he’s incredible.
He’s hilarious and intelligent. They share the same values and get along wonderfully overall. She adores his family, and she finds him super attractive.
“It’s just the commitment aspect and him being avoidant that I wish were different,” she said. “About two weeks ago, he confessed to me that he met up with a girl from a dating app just to get drinks, and they ended up sleeping together.”
“He says that he never felt really wanted by me in the beginning, which is fair as I struggle with words of affirmation, and that’s one of his main love languages. He says that she was so verbal about what she thought of him that he never planned on sleeping with her, but one thing just led to another.”
“He is also saying that he thought he’d feel more confident about himself after that and would believe me more when I try to give him the verbal reassurance he’s looking for, but seeing how much it hurt me, he sees that it wasn’t worth it.”
He’s changed his tune and promised he can see himself heading in the direction of a serious relationship with her.
He also insisted he’s learned a ton over the last two years that they have been together. While she can admit he’s changed, she just feels drained and hurt.
She can sense his remorse for sleeping with this other girl, and she would hate to make him feel more guilty than he already does, but she doesn’t trust him.
Specifically, she doesn’t trust that he won’t change his mind about growing toward a committed relationship in the near future.
She’s worried she’s going to be let down and hurt yet again by him. She was aware getting hurt was a possibility, considering they’re not serious and haven’t been, but she’s still concerned.
“I feel like we both need to contribute to rebuilding that trust, but he says that I just need to let him make his own decisions and get to a place where he loves and cares for me at that level,” she continued.
“I want to rebuild that trust; I just don’t really know how with all the pain I’ve experienced. How do I go about this if I want a relationship with him? I know I sound crazy, and I hope that someone here will hear me out.”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
More About:Romance