If you went on a first date with someone who didn’t disclose that they use a wheelchair and you rejected them, only to have them accuse you of judging their disability, what would you do?
This 26-year-old woman matched with a 28-year-old guy on a dating app, and they chatted for several weeks before meeting up in real life.
She thought they had a genuine connection, and she appreciated that he was sweet, hilarious, and easy to make conversation with.
“We texted every day and eventually decided to meet in person. When I arrived for our date, I realized he was in a wheelchair. His profile had several photos, but none showed it, and it never came up in conversation beforehand,” she explained.
“I was surprised because I genuinely had no idea. The date itself was nice. He was exactly the person I’d been talking to online, and we got along well.”
“But I couldn’t stop thinking about whether I was prepared for a serious relationship with someone who has a physical disability. I know that might sound shallow, but I didn’t want to ignore my feelings and end up leading him on.”
Several days after the first date, this guy asked her out on a second date. But she really was not feeling it, and it came down to him failing to tell her about his wheelchair.
She said thank you for the first date, but stated that she did not feel a romantic spark. This guy pushed her for a reason as to why that was, and she finally told him his wheelchair was the driving factor in her decision.
Her dose of honesty definitely hurt his feelings, and he said she rejected him because he’s disabled. Several of her friends believe she should have given him a chance and that she was cruel.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
“Others say everyone is entitled to their own dating preferences and that being honest was better than stringing him along. Now I’m conflicted,” she continued.
“I never meant to hurt him, but I also don’t think it’s right to date someone when I’m unsure I can fully commit to that kind of relationship.”
She’s left wondering if she overreacted to decline a second date with him because of his wheelchair.
I commend her for being honest instead of lying to him, and I know that was not easy for her. A dealbreaker is a dealbreaker, and nobody should ever feel bad about that.
I do find it strange that this guy didn’t have a single photo of his wheelchair on his dating profile, and it seems to me he intentionally left that major detail out, which is not fair.
What do you think?
You can read the original post below.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
