His Foster Parents Are Trying To Get Him To Change His Name To Something More Professional Sounding
This 16-year-old boy was removed from his mom’s care three years ago, as she was struggling mentally, and it was deemed to be unsafe for him to continue living with his mom.
During his first year of foster care, it was hard as he moved from home to home quite frequently. He’s currently with amazing foster parents, and he’s hoping he can stay with them until he ages out of the system at 18.
His name is Ryder, and while his foster mom and dad haven’t said they exactly hate his name, he can tell that’s how they feel.
He has witnessed his foster mom cringe over his name in the past, and his foster parents also don’t love his middle name.
Sometimes, they attempt to say his name is Ryan, not Ryder, and they basically refer to him by his nickname, which is Ry.
“A month ago, they had asked me if I had ever considered changing my first name when I turn 18 to something more sophisticated sounding,” he explained.
“They even said Ryan could be an idea since it’s so close and they share a nickname. I told them I liked my names and didn’t ever think of changing them. They didn’t say anymore then, but a week later, they told me they had thought a lot about my future, and they worried my name would be something that holds me back.”
“My foster mom said it sounds so lewd when said fast, and they felt I deserved better than that. I told them it didn’t bother me, and I liked that my mom had chosen my name.”
The conversation ended, and he thought they were done discussing it, but a week ago, his foster parents wanted to talk about his name again.
auremar – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
They brought him a few articles that spoke about how important your name is and detailed that parents should name their child something that sets them up for life, not give them a name that’s adorable for just a kid.
His foster parents stated that they realize they cannot force him to change his name, but they are imploring him to do it anyway so he can have a professional future. They’re concerned people will not take him seriously if he keeps Ryder.
“They said they would hate to see me passed over for jobs because of my name,” he added. “And that they feel like a much older me won’t find the name as cool as I do now.”
“They asked if I trusted them, and I said yeah, and they said if I do, I should really give some thought to what I could change my name to [that would] be a better name for adult me.”
“I told them I was really never going to be okay with that. I felt like it was a waste of time and would get me stuck with some name I wouldn’t like. They asked why I was so okay with dismissing future me and why could I not try, when they were doing all they could to help me. I could tell it really got to them that I was still so against it.”
He’s left wondering if it’s wrong of him to refuse to change his name to something more professional and grown up.
What do you think?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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