Having a baby with disabilities can be terrifying for countless reasons. Parents may worry about affording medical treatment, whether their child will make friends, how well their child will be able to complete daily tasks, and so much more.
But one of the biggest fears among parents of severely disabled kids is who will take care of their children once they’re no longer around. So, if there are siblings in the picture, do you believe they should be forced to step up?
This 25-year-old man is currently in the same situation, and he doesn’t think it’s fair. His little brother is 23 years old, severely disabled, and requires 24/7 care.
“And my parents keep telling me that when they’re gone, I’ll be the one who takes over looking after my brother,” he said.
However, he honestly wants to continue leading his own life. He already has his own place, a job, and goals for his future.
“I have no intention of giving all that up to be a full-time caregiver,” he admitted.
He’s tried telling his parents that, too, but they refuse to accept where he’s coming from. Instead, they keep arguing that, when the time comes, he will eventually change his mind.
Quite frankly, though, he knows that his perspective on the matter will never change. Of course, he loves his brother, and he confessed to feeling “awful” for sharing his true feelings, yet he simply does not want to live his life as a caregiver for anyone else.
He underscored that he would visit his brother and be supportive of his brother’s life. Even so, he doesn’t want to “sacrifice everything” in his own life to essentially take on a parental role after his parents pass away.
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“I’m not giving up my life just because my brother happens to be disabled. This isn’t my issue, just because I was born into this family,” he vented.
Regardless, his parents cannot seem to accept where he’s coming from. And to him, it feels like they’re having such a hard time “facing reality” that they’re attempting to “dump” those responsibilities onto him.
Are there other ways to ensure his brother is cared for in the future aside from making him become a caregiver? Does he have the right to say no to accepting that role? What advice would you give him?
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By Katharina Buczek
Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing in... More about Katharina Buczek
