After matching with a guy online, TikToker Erica (@ericathechampion) was excited to finally go on a date with him. He had planned for them to play indoor putt-putt and then go out to dinner at one of her favorite restaurants nearby.
But excitement can sometimes make people forget the less romantic realities of dating. It had been a while since she had gone on a first date, so she had almost forgotten to take the proper basic safety precautions.
On the day of the date, she remembered to do a reverse look-up of this guy’s phone number. To her surprise, a mug shot from this past summer popped up.
Public records showed that he was charged with a DUI and with endangering a minor, which meant he was drinking and driving with his kid in the car, someone else’s kid in the car, or possibly a teenage girl.
Regardless of the specifics, the situation was deeply unsettling.
So, she sent him a text, canceling the date. Her text read, “I hate to do this, but I just looked up your number, and I found some disturbing things online, and I’ve decided that it makes sense to just cancel. I wish you the best.”
Then, she blocked him on everything.
Erica pointed out that it was sad how women have to take such drastic measures to ensure their safety before doing something as simple as going on a date.
What should be a fun night out often requires background checks, safety plans, and exit strategies. The emotional weight of having to protect yourself all the time can be exhausting, and it’s something that men don’t typically deal with.
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In the comments section, several TikTok users backed her decision to cancel the date and shared their own sobering experiences. Their stories emphasized their belief that Erica did the right thing.
“My dad was a police officer killed in the line of duty by a drunk driver. It ruined my entire family’s life. A DUI means everything. It is the biggest deal,” commented one user.
“You gotta check them! I dated a guy for two months and randomly asked if he had been arrested before, and turns out he had recently been in prison for two years. Legit genuinely nice guy, but…” wrote another.
“Canceled mine. He came up as a level two offender and in the registry,” added a third.
“A DUI is a huge deal. My dad was directing traffic and was hit by a drunk driver. Years later, he has horrible hip pain, so to us, it’s a huge deal,” chimed in someone else.
Until dating doesn’t come with such risks, being cautious is not an option. It’s necessary for survival.
By Emily Chan
Emily Chan is a writer who covers lifestyle and news content. She graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in... More about Emily Chan
