Doesn’t everyone have that one ex who’s just like a gross pop-up ad you can’t manage to click out of? Some old flames won’t stay extinguished and just want to haunt your current relationship.
We’ve all dealt with a ghost from the past, and while it can be harmless, his girlfriend has a man whose been orbiting her since she was only a teen.
Now, his girlfriend’s ex is a married dad calling from burner numbers to suggest they run away together, and he’s afraid that calling up the wife is the only way to get this to stop once and for all.
This 25-year-old man has a girlfriend, Monica, who is the same age as him, and they have been dating on and off for the last eight years.
Back when they were younger, Monica moved to another country for a year. After she returned, she blocked him because she began seeing her gym coach, Kevin.
“Important detail: she was around 16 years old, and Kevin was about 12 years older than her. He also already had a girlfriend (Robin, around the same age as Kevin),” he explained.
“My girlfriend didn’t know that at first, but when she found out, he told her he was planning to leave Robin and just needed time because they had been together for years.”
“Monica and Kevin ended up having an affair while Kevin supposedly broke up with Robin. Eventually, my girlfriend told Robin about everything, hoping Kevin would finally choose. Robin gave Kevin an ultimatum with the condition that if they stayed together, they had to move states, and he chose Robin.”
So, Kevin and Robin moved to a new state, Kevin shattered Monica’s heart, and then Monica found her way back to him, and they got into a relationship.
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And I’m sure you’re curious if Monica left Kevin in the past, but no, she did not. Kevin didn’t end up disappearing. Kevin’s job requires him to travel to their city on occasion, and from time to time, he calls Monica from various phone numbers to offer the same thing.
Kevin says to Monica that he will happily leave his wife and kids behind so that they can run away and finally end up together.
Monica used to tell him when Kevin would call, and she would block the number he used. He did value her candor, and then from 2024 to 25, Monica quit talking about Kevin.
He took that to mean that Kevin abandoned his mission and saw that Monica wasn’t interested in ending their relationship. But lately, he and Monica have been navigating a rough patch, which he thought had nothing to do with Kevin.
“Normally, we’re good at communicating and solving things, but this time she says she doesn’t even know how to explain what she’s feeling,” he added.
“Last week, during a conversation, she casually mentioned: ‘Yeah… Kevin called me last month.’ This was around the same time our relationship problems started (once you connect the dots, I can only think that we started having issues because of his last call and whatever he said to her).”
He questioned his girlfriend about why she failed to tell him about all of Kevin’s calls, and she responded that Kevin routinely calls her two to three times each month with the same proposition, so she didn’t think the calls were worth mentioning.
Last year, while he was sitting there assuming Kevin had quit calling, that wasn’t the case.
It was just that Monica no longer told him about it.
“We were having a kind of ‘deep’ conversation about ‘first love,’ and then she said something that really stuck with me: ‘If you ever had to worry about me leaving you for someone, it would be Kevin.’ That comment came completely out of nowhere during our conversation,” he said.
“Now I can’t stop wondering: what exactly did Kevin say when he called last month? Did he say something that made her start doubting our relationship? Is that connected to the problems we’re having now? I have asked her this, but she says that she doesn’t know how to feel or where her head’s at.”
“For a long time, I’ve also thought about texting his wife Robin and telling her, ‘Hey, your husband still calls my girlfriend asking her to run away with him. Could you please make him stop?’ But they now have a kid together, and I didn’t want to create a huge conflict that affects the child.”
While he’s doubting that tipping Robin off to Kevin’s calls is a good idea, he kind of wants to do this and shut Kevin down, even if it implodes his family.
He’s left wondering if he should reach out to Robin or if he should mind his own business.
Actually, no, I don’t believe calling Robin is the best way to handle this, because there’s a better solution: dumping Monica. There’s no way that Monica is truly in love with him; otherwise, she wouldn’t still be entertaining Kevin. Kevin will forever be her backup plan.
I did have an ex who stalked me a few years ago and kept calling to try to get me to dump my boyfriend at the time, and do you know what I did? I changed my phone number to get the calls to stop. He quit calling after that, because I was unreachable.
I do not think that Monica has blocked Kevin at all, and she’s clearly picking up the phone, especially if she hinted at leaving him for Kevin!!!
What do you think he should do?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
